Maybe you'll need some medication to get you through this Saturn time?.........probably a good time for a checkup......since you have free access in the UK (we don't here)...

Let me know what the doctor says Paul....

 

I see that more anxiety now around the home life, (Prog.Moon conjuncts your natal North Node in the 4th)...is no doubt affecting you emotionally.

 

Then of course that Saturn return.

 

Not to mention Pluto over your 7th hs. with BML over it Transiting over your natal Netpune.

 

The dream state might be affected with BML over Neptune too.

 

Best to see the doctor asap.

 

 

Then that's good it seems........to keep you more on an "even keel" is a good thing.

 

You might want to let it be more the doctor's call whether to keep you on this course of anti-dep. meds.

There could easily be a neuroligcal imblance that needs to be helped by these types of meds.

As usual have been meaning to post for ages and ages and somehow weeks have gone by and I've no explanation for myself...

 

Debs, was so shocked to hear about your daughter. I know that she had issues and that you'd been worried about her from reading her solar return chart but had tried to be optimistic and hoped we were being overly gloomy. Had really hoped that the crisis she was in could have given her access to the professional help she needed to work on her problems.

At first I thought you were writing about a dream that it had happened, guess I do own a pair of rose coloured glasses after all. What a sad tragedy for all of you, you have my deepest sympathies.

 

Had joined the new D&H site on multiply but it seems that every MSN group is shunning it after all. Applied to your stream cypher one today. Am not going to bother with any other groups any more, even as a lurker, just this one I think.

 

Flash, how is the medication working for you now? Anti-depressants can take a couple of weeks to settle into the system before giving any real effect and the starting dose is quite low, once your GP upped the dose you should have felt a difference. Hope you are feeling better, despite how dark and dismal this time of the year is.

3 times in my life I've asked for anti-depressants and been given such a run-around I've walked away with nothing and vowed never to ask again no matter what. Then a few months ago my GP practically threw them at me (and at my mum last year) even though I didn't want them. Ridiculous. They have taken the edge off how miserable everything is a little but the biggest effect is definitely the tiredness, especially at first, couldn't stop yawning all day long, yet my dreams are instantly forgettable and of a very fractured, bitty quality; not as strong as they were, couldn't describe one if I tried now. Have your dreams been affected?

When my mum was on Prozac she used to chase me round the house yelling "I love you!", which was really unnerving (we're not an affectionate family) but fortunately I haven't had that effect.

 

Like you I think Saturn had a hand in my misery. Had Saturn opposing my sun for far too long. Suddenly I've noticed things have started working out for me again and looking at my chart now it's since Saturn finally b*ggered off out the picture. Practically fell into a job locally where I'll be able to learn accounting; got a lot of compensation from being messed around trying to get home from holiday recently and my chav queen neighbour and her hellions suddenly moved out last week after the press got her address from an infamous court case she's involved in at the moment. My mum's health is not good but things have been going suspisciously well these last 2 months (for me). Just gotta hold on for a little while Flash and things will pick back up again for you, hope the meds are helping in the meantime.

Oh Saturn is such a killjoy isn't he?! Wow, sounds like the anti-depressants affected you really badly. My mum reckoned that the Prozac made her start having panic attacks; she's always been the anxious sort so I don't know if the meds somehow  exacerbated that or what. Because I've tried St John's Wort in the past the Dr decided to try me on something else (Citalopram, which supposedly reduces syptoms of diabetic neuropathy too, which is a plus for me), don't know which they tried you on but maybe none of them would suit you then. I don't think I'd be willing to go back to tty more either if I'd had the emotional roller-coaster experience that it gave you, what a shame it didn't work out. I have noticed that I must be grinding my teeth at nights too recently, not good, but I haven't had any great highs and I'm used to lows so...

 

Cutting down on the booze could be a good idea in terms of your mood and health. I've found myself doing the same. (Not that I have the stamina or the inclination to drink till daylight anymore and then want to go dancing). It doesn't lift my mood anymore either, just makes me more tired, and I simply don't have the energy to spare. The hardest part is making the mental transition from being a binge drinker back to being unashamed to ask for the soft stuff occasionally and savouring the taste of a drink now and again. Breaking the habit was the hard part but it's surprising how my friends will join me in the soft option occasionally, as though they are secretly relieved they don't have to punish themselves with booze to be out too.

 

Yeah, Saturn contacting Mars does not a happy temper make. Having the opposition natally I spent a large part of my youth having to learn to conrtol my anger so you truly have my sypathy on that one, can't imagine I'd have the energy for a good fight nowadays though! Wish I'd done more skilled martial arts in my youth, maybe trying something like that would be good for you now? Saturn on Mars could be learning to rein in any anger and energy and turning it into something skilled and disciplined and the training might give you a handle on the fits of energy/anger that the transit brings. Also excercise is no doubt better for your mood overall than drugs. Hm, that's if you can afford the classes with the economy being the way it is right now and having job problems. Have you ever tried Yoga? There's no martial connection but it's still disciplining your energy, quite good for the mood and you can do it in your own home for free. Speaking of which I really ought to do something like that too, perhaps I should take my own advice for once.

 

The job market is so poor at the moment, The majority of employers seem to be asking for the moon on a stick for minimum pay, employees are really over a barrell and scared to lose what little they have. I accepted my new job because it's near enough that I can walk there in under half an hour (and the Dr does keep nagging me to do more exercise) and I'll get experience that will get me better paid jobs in the future, possibly even in the same company as they've hired me with a view of taking over from a co-worker there when she retires. The pay is fairly low, though more than they quoted at the interview, which is surprising. They were so embarrassed of how low the pay was that they couldn't even say it out loud, they wrote it down and pointed at it while blushing. But I'm glad to be there, it's a very small office (a small, private company) so it's quite friendly and I'd only have to spend any extra wages and more time travelling to the city every day anyway so it's not a huge loss really. The boss is March born I believe, knew there was a good whack of Pisces in him even if mixed with Aries. Not to say that they are the only good ones but it's good to have a Piscean boss (I had one before who was very nice too), he has his little bugbears but overall he's very fair with everyone, the perks are better than average and he's very approachable. More than the company itself or the work it's the person you have in charge that makes all the difference I find. I hope that you find yourself somewhere where you fit in too, maybe your Saturn transit will sort that out in the end.

Trying to look at this last year objectively I NEEDED a new job after having wasted so many years in temp jobs (because of my health being so shoddy at the time that I didn't want to take on any responsibility) where I wasn't in a position to gain any experience or ranking so despite all the hassle of being unemployed and broke for a long while it was definitely an area of my life that needed an overhaul; At least I had some time off to sort out the Diabetes and now I actually have some prospects with regards to the future. Maybe Saturn did do me a favour in the end, I dunno. It's still a little difficult to be positive about things just yet so soon after this long Saturn transit and return....

Hate to sound so twee but I'm going to quote the Stones "you can't always get want you want, but if you try, sometimes you just might find, you get what you need".

 

There are so many social networks now aren't there it's hard to keep up. I gave in to Facebook in the end, which isn't too bad and they have some charity applications that I like to use, if you change your mind or if any of our other regulars are on it my email add should be on my profile here so feel free to add me. A shame we don't have more members in the same places to actually have proper meet ups now and again. Haven't succumbed to MySpace, though perhaps I should eh. I listened to the tracks you released a little while back, not really my genre but good stuff, wish you the best of luck getting more out

Hi Oneiro:

 

Sounds to me that life is improving for you overall....in many ways,esp. the job ,one that you can both tolerate, and perhaps (if all goes well)  enjoy!

 

As for Ralph & I, we do the best we can, living just day to day.

I get my first social security check (who would have thought?)I'd ever get THAT old?

 

Anyway, it comes in March 09, and not much because I haven't worked full time since the children were born when I was 25.

I worked as a Real Estate agent, for a short while in the 1980s to get the necessary quarters in to allow me a check at age 62. It will be only $500.00 per month, but Ralph has already allocated it (spent it), in many ways,.

 

We aren't really looking forward to Christmas, (we don't decorate for instance) as we  have no children or grandchildren around us now.

Becky (the oldest) moved across the country now to the east coast, (she's miserable there of course, and I did her SR at the time, but she still moved), even though the SR showed how miserable she'd be in the new place. COLD , WET, and always miserable weather over there compared to 300 sunny days in Arizona.

 

Well, serves her right for moving  We visited her new home last month for 2 weeks or so, and went to see Niagara Falls, while there as she's within reach of it by a few  hours.

 

It surprised us because the Falls aren't so large afterall.....and we always thought they would be. I think when you live in AZ, everything here is larger then life (big Falls), so when you go to Niagara in Canada or NY, it pales in comparison.

But it was nice anyway, just to see them finally.

 

We saw our two grandchldren, (Becky's kids), Dean   &  Lindsey, ages 12 (a Pisces boy), and Linds, (Virgo Sun age 8), while there

and that was very nice since we miss them so much.

Ralph especially so, as he has a Cancer moon, and is so much the mommy of family.,loves little kids.

 

Of course, Jessica's death was not a real shock, but yet devastating to us all.

Especially to her sister Jennifer, who had re-introduced herself into the relationship with her little sister only 18 months ago.

So, jen did get 18 months with her, (mostly worry, and upset but a lot of happier times too, when they shopped together, laughed together , went to restaurants together, and just enjoyed their sisterhood reunion),

But not being able to stop Jessica's mental derangement, was terrible for Jen as for Becky.

 

We were not able to do this, even though I dreamt consistently over 5 years how very much she was in trouble (mentally), and warned everyone, in the end, we couldn't stop it.

 

Now since she is gone, these nightmares of her mental & emotional deranged mind are ceased.

 

The last one I had was in Egypt, this last June, our last trip.

That one was unlike all my other dreams, in that it was very short, and to the point.

 

It simply showed me many "boxes" and in each box, Jess was scattered, (a piece of her) in each box.

 

I knew upon awakening, it was saying, her mind was very scattered now, but still in August, just 2 months later, when the end came, we were still devastated as nothing can prepare you for this.

 

Now there are two little girls, (twins age 4.5) without a mom.

Their dad (typical Jess choice), will not allow us to see them.,but he will allow Jen & Becky to occassionally see them.

 

Thank god, because we manage to get the photos and the video of their lives and have saved them for the girls.

 

One day they will think for themselves, and want to meet their grandparents long denied them, but until then we try to do the best we can with what we've got.

 

I'm glad you joined CyberStream , and I'll okay the membership today.

I'm still looking about, to see if I can find a place that I can archive our history.......I think I might have found one, but we'll also keep Cyberstream as a place we all can communicate both astrology, our dreams and whatever else.

 

I was trying to find a place like this one that gives us a great deal of

space and freedom and is easy to use.

But looks like the archiving or transfer of old posts I couldn't do on the Cyberstream.

 

Perhaps I'll find a 2nd spot soon to add our archives.

 

Glad to read your update and that you are doing well.

 

Deb (Merry Christmas to all, and may the Prince of Peace

bring peace into all of our lives as we recall his love)

Here is a picture of Jen with her neices (Jessica's two girls now)

for they were at Jen's for dinner and tree trimming yesterday:

 

 

 

 

Wow, there's a really strong facial resemblance to you in all of them isn't there, no danger of ever passing each other in the street without recognising each other!

 

Cyberstream didn't work out for us.

 

So instead I have this new site and hope you join it soon, it's up and running.

 

Unlike the goofy owner of Cyberstream, I don't think we'll have any difficulty with this site:

 

 

We are waiting for you, (Flashgord , me and Maggie are all there now)

Waiting for you and astrologos (Lilli) to join up.