|
|
 |
|
Reply
| |
Hello HOH family,
I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving. I ended up accepting an invitation from my cousin to come to Thanksgiving dinner at his place. I love my cousin, he's great. His wife is great. His daughter is great. BUT..........damn it if he didn't pick the most rural housing development in the WORLD to buy a house! I'm talking 1.5 hours on the main highway, then 1.5 on crazy, curvy, dark, scary roads where there are many fatalities every year due to people hitting deer, poor weather conditions, or both.
So I had to drive because I just don't trust my Mom's night time vision. After we got home that night I put my son down for bed and then I started having a serious cyclic vomiting attack. I was able to stop it for the most part by taking three different meds that are prescribed to me to do just that. I think the stress of focusing on driving for so many hours triggered an attack. I'm just thankful the meds did their job and I was able to go to bed and sleep versus nonstop vomiting all night. It's weird.
Other than that things are going well. I'm finishing up winter quarter at school. I'm happy I have completed yet another quarter that brings me closer to my goal of earning a degree in business. As many of you know my fiance lives in Salem, Mass and I live in Seattle, WA. He is in Seattle every month for business so we see each other every couple weeks. I travel to Salem every few months as well. When I'm finished with my degree I'm moving to Salem, Mass and I plan on attending law school in Boston. I'm looking into schools right now. It's still awhile off, but I'm super excited.
He has fraternal twins age four that live with their mother but he has them every weekend and two to three times during the week. He's a great dad and his boys are really sweet. My fiance is divorced and he is fifteen years my senior but we get along so well. We've been together for some time now and I'm so happy I got sober and left my abusive ex who is now HIV positive. Had I not done the work necessary to change my life I wouldn't be in school, I wouldn't be engaged to a wonderful man that treats me with love and respect, I wouldn't have my amazing two year old son in my custody, I wouldn't be happy and content.
I'm now on twice a month dosing at the clinic which means I go in every other week and meet with the physician's assistant to pick up my supply of methadone pills. I no longer have to stand in a dosing line which is great. I feel like I've really made progress. Less than 5% of methadone patients ever make it to this level of takehome status so I feel good that I'm one of them. As you know I'm still on Interferon. I'll find out at the end of this month whether it's working or not based on whether I have at least a two log drop in viral load levels. This is standard practice, at the three month point all patients are evaluated and the decision is made to either continue or discontinue treatment based on whether they are responding or not. I guess if you don't respond by then you won't. So I hope I'm a responder because I just want to stay on treatment and finish at 48 weeks and hopefully be Hep C free. That's my wish. I hope it comes true.
My ex is still using drugs and is homeless are usual. He was diagnosed with HIV in August 2008. He will most likely die in the streets because he will do anything to better his situation. He wants someone to take him into their house, pay the bills, give him money for drugs, schedule all his appointments, drive him to said appointments, etc. That's what I did when we were together. I was using at the time and we were locked in a toxic relationship for a few years. When I got pregnant in 2006 I realized I had to change my life for good or else have an abortion. I wasn't going to have a child and exposed the baby to a life of dysfunction, drug abuse, domestic violence, poverty from being a drug addict, etc. So I started doing whatever I had to do in order to get clean and stay clean.
It didn't happen right away but it did happen. My son was a serious wake up for me. In the beginning I got clean for him but after I had him I stayed clean for me as well. My life is so different today. I mean if you looked at how I was living say back in 2005 and compared it to how I live today you would be amazed. I have a schedule, my son is on a set schedule. I go to bed early. I study daily. I do the grocery shopping every week. I clean the house daily and do the laundry since my mother works and she pays most of the bills. She is a godsend. I really appreciate her allowing me and my son to live with her while I attend school. She had to cut me off when I was using because she was enabling me to continue living like that. Im so happy we have a wonderful healthy relationship today.
I'm happy today. I was never happy when using. Sure I got that sense of elation when driving to cop drugs and whatnot but eventually that turned to paranoia. The drugs stopped working and I was unhappy when high and unhappy when not high. I was abusing crack because I couldn't get off with just heroin anymore. My addiction to crack and heroin took me to the gutter. I'm so thankful I"m not there today.
TK
|
|
 First
Previous
2-7 of 7
Next
Last
|
Reply
| |
Hey Tk, Your going to go to law school,?/ YOU ROCK GIRL...... Did you ever in a million years think you were going to be contemplating going to law school in Boston?? I bet not... Life has a funny way of keeping us on our toes, dont you think?? Im so proud and happy for you, Much Love Karen  p.s. how old is your son now? |
|
Reply
| |
WOW,Good for you!!!!! Its so nice hearing that it is possible.I read this and so wish that it was me...You sound so happy,im glad to know that you are genuinely happy with your life now that your clean....Take care!!!!Stay happy Samra |
|
Reply
| |
 Samra, There isnt one thing in this life that you cant achieve if you want it bad enough..You have come along way, Love Karen |
| |
Reply
| |
| It's so great to pop in and hear news like yours. You should be very proud of what you've accomplished! |
|
Reply
| |
Wow that post put me in my place! Anything is possible,no matter where you were yesterday. Thank you for doing what you are doing,I needed to know that the light at the end of the tunnel was still on. |
|
Reply
| |
Hey, Thunder! It's great to hear from you! I am so happy to hear you are doing well. Yay, happy thanksgivings! I just had to write you, because your post struck a chord with me. I am moving to Seattle with my boyfriend, but he is moving at least 3 months prior to me. How did you work that out with you and your fiance? How long have you been engaged? How is it dating long-distance? Also, does he know you are on methadone? I am currently on suboxone and doing very, very well. My boyfriend knows all about it. However, I'm TERRIFIED of moving to Seattle and leaving my doctor. What if they try to put me on a lower dose too quickly? I take a lot: 16 mgs per day. I started out at 24 mgs per day! So, I'm doing well as far as tapering goes. No relapsing, either. Do you know any really good docs? If this is out of line, I understand, but I am so scared of getting the rug pulled out from under me. I'm also scared about whether or not I'll still have my boyfriend ... he might not wait 3 months for me! I went to a doctor here who tried to get me started on much too low of a dose, and who rushed me through the treatment process. I relapsed because of it. This was before my current doctor, who is a godsend. Now, I'm decreasing my dose on my own every time! I don't want a repeat of the first experience. Sorry for all of the questions ... I'm glad to hear you are getting your business degree!! I am working in my field right now, and have had a lot of success as far as my career goes. I'm really more concerned about my addiction and my relationship issues at the moment: they are the most unpredictable! If you could get back to me, I'd really appreciate it! You can also send me an email. Thanks - I hope your Saturday rocked! Cheers, Sugar |
|
|
First
Previous
2-7 of 7
Next
Last
|
|
|
Free Forum Hosting
Important Announcement
Return to All Message Boards