Greetings to all .... found this site about a month ago and didn't jump right into actually participating because i was certain i must be in some bad dream ... the Dr.s had to be off ... afterall ... a AM "super-mom" who can defeat anything and never has given into "weakness" .... Ya know ... 4 babies, no meds what-so-ever ... cancer ...( licked )... former "drill-sergeant" dance & aerobic instructor ... single mom, working from home, able to provide and make ends meet, paying bills on time .... Sunday School teacher ... Sign Language ministry ... friend, counselor, etc. ... etc .... i can do - and forge - myself through anything!! ...... or can i ????
No! This cannot be happening to me! I have no options but to continue on with the zaniness of my life ... I have 4 children who depend on me! (Well, 3 little ones ... my eldest is on his own now and trying to help mom) ...Surely, prayer, a few added vitamins, herbs, consult with a Chinese guru ... sheer guts and determination can make all of this go away! .... no need to jump right into a forum i would probably not be able to relate to ... afterall ... i must be mis-diagnosed!
It's been 9 weeks now and i am succumbing to reality ... i gave in and had my first stellate ganglion block this past week ... for about 3 hrs i had a little more flexibility, then it went back to status quo ... the burning is now a 9/10 ... 10/10 .... can't escape it ... Doc says we must be aggressive with treatment, so block will be done 2 x wk ... i had to laugh ... Doc repeatedly asked during 1st block, if i was okay and i would simply mumble an "uh-huh" ... He wasn't satisfied with that response and kept asking me over and over if i was sure that i was okay ... lol .... i finally quietly replied that i was simply deep in prayer, to please stop asking! ... i needed God to be directing that needle that felt like it was going to rip through the back of my throat at any moment! ... i was also so wanting to reply, "Sure doc ... this is your everyday position ... lying flat on your back with a needle going into your neck! ... NO, I'M NOT OKAY!" ... lol ...
Anyhow, forgive my ramblings ......... while my hope is in the Lord, i truly believe He is nudging me to nestle where others are enduring the same nightmare and to spend some time with those earth angels He already has in place ... After hopping around a bit, i have already been blessed by encouragement exchanged by others here .... i look forward to getting to know those who come here seeking hope and strength to face a new day ... wisdom from those of you who have bravely battled RSD for too long and have much to share ...
My simple prayer right now is for me to be the mom i need and desire to remain ... in spirit ... in provision ... and attitude .... i pray earnestly each day for the pain not to steal my joy ... i catch glimpses of a grumpy-monkey trying to take over when the pain is incessant (which is most of the time now) ... i hate this for my children .... So. for all of you who are prayer warriors ... please add me and my children to your prayer list and i, of course will be adding each of you to my fervant prayers ... my trust is that "through Christ, truly, all things are possible!!!!" ............ blessings to all .... In His Grip ...
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