An old farmer went into town to see a movie. The ticket counter clerk asked him, "Sir, what's that on your shoulder?" The farmer replied, "That's my pet rooster, Chuck. Wherever I go, Chuck goes too."
"I'm sorry, sir," said the ticket clerk, "but we can't allow animals in the theater." So the old farmer went around the corner, stuffed the rooster down his overalls, then returned to the booth, bought a ticket, and entered the theater. He sat down next to two old ladies named Mildred, and Marge. The movie started, and the rooster began to squirm, so the old farmer unbuttoned his fly so that Chuck could stick his head out and watch.
"Marge!" whispered MIldred. "I think the guy next to me is a pervert! He undid his pants, and he has his thing out!" whispered MIldred. "Well, don't worry about it," replied Marge. "Hell, at our age we've seen them all." "Yeah, but this is the first time one ate my popcorn"! 
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