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| | From:  Chrismac682 (Original Message) | Sent: 4/5/2008 8:44 PM |
| A Day at a Time Sunday, April 6, 2008 Reflection for the Day What do we say to a person who has slipped, or one who calls for help? We can carry the message, if they're willing to listen; we can share our experience, strength and hope. Perhaps the most important thing we can do, however, is to tell the person that we love him or her, that we're truly happy he or she is back and that we want to help all we can. And we must mean it. Can I still "go to school" and continue to learn from the mistakes and adversities of others? Today I Pray May I always have enough love to weclome back to the group someone who has slipped. May I listen to that person's story-of-woe, humbly. For there, but for my Higher Power, go I. May I learn from others' mistakes and pray that I will not re-enact them. Today I Will Remember Sobriety is never fail-safe. Hazelden Foundation |
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One Day at a Time Tuesday, Dec. 9, 2008 Pass It On I'll never forget the first time I met Bill Wilson. I was a couple of months sober and so excited, so thrilled to actually meet the co-founder that I gushed all over him with what my sobriety meant to me
and my undying gratitude for his starting AA. When I ran down, he took my hand in his and said simply,
'Pass it on.'
Reprinted from Pass It On, Preface, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. Recovery Related Acronym A A = Always Awesome. |
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One Day at a Time Wednesday, Dec. 9, 2008 Humility On his desk, Dr. Bob had a plaque defining humility: "Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore; to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and kneel to my Father in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble."
Reprinted from Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, Page 222, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... The storm has passed. I've learned a little more about peace.
It was inside all the time. Recovery Related Acronym H O W = Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness. |
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One Day at a Time Thursday, Dec. 11, 2008 Soul Perspective Giving Giving (called Dana in Sanskrit) is one of the most important virtues. It is basic to all other virtues or soul qualities since it is expressed through the physical body. In fact, it is the primary means of overcoming inertia to which our physical nature is inclined. The Buddha considered it the foundation of the spiritual journey, and that it is. Our practice of giving helps us to develop a sensitivity to others and to circumstances around us. It helps us to grow in respect and in generosity. Giving begins the process of transformation, even without seeking it. The Buddha said: “Before giving, the mind of the giver is happy; while giving, the mind of the giver is made peaceful; and having given, the mind of the giver is uplifted.�?It is through giving who and what we are that we experience happiness. The soul always seeks to manifest something of value to the world through your thoughts, feelings and actions. Soul is not motivated by what you will get out of it, but rather by what you can give. It is motivated by awareness of need. It knows that you have the ability to respond to that need, thereby restoring something or someone to a stature of dignity or value. Giving and receiving Giving is not done to fulfill a psychological need to receive. That would be self-centred egoic manipulation. Giving is done as a natural expression of the soul beginning to awaken the heart. To give with true generosity, we need to cultivate the ability to receive graciously without taking or grasping. When we are able to receive with equanimity, we have the spirit to give without expectation. According to the Bhagavad Gita, giving and receiving are the same when done with detachment. This implies that one both gives and receives with gratitude. It is as much a privilege to give as to receive. And one can do both without being attached to them. This requires that one focuses on the love that is shared more than on the object or act through which it is expressed. This way, one stays soul connected. The detachment that accompanies giving then does not give preference to anyone. One gives to strangers as well as to familiars. Be aware of your motives Putting forth efforts to reach out, such as by doing good deeds, helping others, and the like, are fine, but they do not necessarily lead us to be less self-centred. It all depends on our motivation. Do we act out of a desire for comfort or security or appreciation? Do we act to make life around us conform to our image of the way life should be? Or do we respond with detachment to what we perceive as real need? We have to know ourselves sufficiently to know what our true motives are. Helping others as a way of fulfilling one’s own psychological needs is not necessarily harmful to others, but it is not the most healthy approach. The motivation to help others can be mixed altruism and selfishness. It can be a way to avoid dealing with what is going on within ourselves. If we are to honour the soul, we cannot use others to get the comfort, solace, security and love we feel we are lacking. Our motives will usually be mixed. We give because we recognize a need, and we feel good or get some appreciation because of our giving. We must not stop giving just because our motivation might not be pure. To gain greater awareness does not necessarily require us to stop our practice that was conducted without awareness. Being aware during the act of giving purifies intention and can help us develop detachment and get beyond our self absorption. Our gifts to life On the spiritual journey there are always two essential elements. One is relating to a reality greater than oneself, and the other is helping or giving to others. These two elements speak to one reality �?that is, our unity with all life and our specific duty to serve the other in the situations in which we find ourselves. The Buddha taught that “the greatest gift is the act of giving itself�?because it portrays the true nature of all life, which is to give itself that all might live and love. Although the motivation is not self-centred, giving to help and free others also helps and frees us because I and the other are one. It was with this understanding that when asked why he gave so much and helped so many people, Ghandi humbly replied: “I don’t give to anyone. I do it all for myself.�? To make our giving a true gift, we could be aware of some guidelines: - True giving requires some sacrifice on the part of the giver.
- True giving must show respect, and not condescension, toward the recipient.
- We are grateful to the recipient for making the act of giving possible.
| Exercises: - In what ways have you given recently, and to whom?
- What do you find easiest or most enjoyable to give?
- What is most difficult for you to give?
- To whom are you able to give with no expectations of return or thanks?
- Do you have any past experiences that might affect the way you give and receive today?
- What prevents you from giving when you perceive a need?
- What usually motivates your giving?
- Identify some of your actions and behaviours that are considered ‘doing good�?and examine the motivations behind them. Are you acting out of a ‘should�? to maintain a certain self-image, to get approval or some other personal need or desire met, to fill some lack you feel, to feel useful, to feel connected, to avoid pain or something else?
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Go beyond just understanding and attain more perspectives, experiences and integration to enable you to heal the past and create the future. |
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One Day at a Time Friday, Dec. 12, 2008 Inner Journey Valuing the moment "... the only time you ever have in which to learn anything or see anything or feel anything, or express any feeling or emotion, or respond to an event, or grow, or heal, is this moment, because this is the only moment any of us ever gets. You’re only here now; you’re only alive in this moment."-- Jon Kabat-Zinn Many people regularly squander their time. They live under the assumption that they'll live forever. As a result, they don't value the present as a precious opportunity that will never come again. Others continually race against time, trying to cram too many activities into each hour, and suffering stress in the process. In our view, we are more effective and most happy when we balance being and doing. We continually ask ourselves what’s most important to get done. And we’re learning to BE -- fully present -- when we do. We also regularly give ourselves permission to relax. Make today really matter. It's all you'll ever have. "Very few of us know how much we can put into life if we use it properly, wisely, and economically. Let us economize our time -- lifetimes ebb away before we wake up, and that is why we do not realize the value of the immortal time God has given us." -- Paramahansa Yogananda Never have time for what you really want in life? Take control of the time of your life by changing your mind. |
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One Day at a Time Saturday, Dec. 13, 2008 A New Dimension In the late stages of our drinking, the will to resist has fled. Yet when we admit complete defeat and when we become entirely ready to try AA principles, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension -- freedom under God as we understand Him. Reprinted from As Bill Sees It, Page 283, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Within our wonderful new world,
we have found freedom from our fatal obsession. Recovery Related Acronym H J F = Happy, Joyous, Free. |
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One Day at a Time Sunday, Dec. 14, 2008 H.O.W. They said if you want to know how this program works,
take the first word of your question -- the "H" is for honesty,
the "O" is for open-mindedness, and the "W" is for willingness;
these our Big Book calls the essentials of recovery.
Reprinted from Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 549-550, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour. Recovery Related Acronym H O W = Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness. A Member Shares... I'm Deb, and I am an alcoholic. When I was drinking, I drank to black-outs, I hid full bottles in case my family poured out one bottle I would have another, I hid empty bottles so my family wouldn't know how much I drank that day, and I arranged my schedule as to not interfere with my drinking times. Finally, I'd had enough, and came here to AAOnline. I was disgusted with myself, fearful, lonely, and baffled. I had never been able to stay sober "Deb's" way. I had put together some very miserable "dry" days or weeks, but that was hell, and it definitely wasn't living. I'd tried limiting how much I was going to drink, not drinking hard liquor, never drinking in the morning or at work, etc., and, just like the Big Book says, it only got worse. I reached out for help, and the hand of AA was there for me. People in this room welcomed me, talked to me, told me of their experiences, told me how it worked for them, suggested the first steps to me to stay sober, just for that day. I saw people who had been just like me who had been able to get sober. And I saw how happy they were. At the time, I couldn't comprehend that. My God, sober and happy? Free from the obsession of alcohol? The desire to drink removed? I wanted that! And I wanted to know HOW. I kept coming back, and was here in this room for 3-4 meetings a day, listening. What was the magic word that changed these people's lives? There was no one magic word for me, but I did hear many things, too many to try to mention in one share, but a few of the key things to me were: there is a better life; this is a simple program -- a "we" program. And all we have to do is to be honest, with ourselves and with others, be willing, and to take action. Honestly admit we are powerless over alcohol, and our lives had become unmanageable. Willing to work the Steps, go to meetings, and get a sponsor. Willing to turn our will and our lives over to a Higher Power, to give back what was so freely given to us, and to be there for anyone suffering or struggling. Today, I have more than I ever imagined in sobriety, a loving God is with me every moment of each day, I have the tools of the program to handle whatever life throws my way, and I have the fellowship of AA. This program, is a "we" program. We can do this; "I" cannot do this alone. By the Grace of God, the program of AA, and the Fellowship, I am sober today, thank you for letting me share. |
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One Day at a Time Monday, Dec. 15, 2008 Housecleaning We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. If we haven't the will to do this, we ask until it comes. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol. Reprinted from Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 76, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Trust God. Clean house. Help others. Recovery Related Acronym A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change |
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One Day at a Time Tuesday, Dec. 16, 2008 Tolerance Honesty with ourselves and others gets us sober, but it is tolerance that keeps us that way. Experience shows that few alcoholics will long stay away from a group just because they don't like the way it is run.
Most return and adjust themselves to whatever conditions they must. Some go to a different group, or form a new one. In other words, once an alcoholic fully realizes he cannot get well alone, he will somehow find a way to get well and stay well in the company of others. It has been that way from the beginning of AA and probably always will be so.
Reprinted from As Bill Sees It, Page 312, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Patience, tolerance, understanding and love are the watchwords. Recovery Related Acronym P U T = Patience, Understanding, Tolerance |
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| One Day at a Time Wednesday, Dec. 17, 2008 Fear For all its usual destructiveness, we have found that fear can be the starting point for better things. Fear can be a steppingstone to prudence
and a decent respect for others. It can point the path to justice, as well as to hate. And the more we have of respect and justice, the more we shall begin to find the love which can suffer much, and yet be freely given.
- Bill W., January 1962.
Reprinted from As Bill Sees It, Page 22, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Fear is not an admission of weakness;
fear is an opportunity for courage. Recovery Related Acronym F E A R = Forgetting Everything's All Right |
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One Day at a Time Thursday, Dec. 18, 2008 Not-worrying None of us has to understand our Higher Power or worry about things beyond our control. We can indulge ourselves in the luxury of not-worrying. . . We simply stop messing in our Higher Power's business.
And in my opinion, when we stop messing and stop worrying,
we have turned our will and our lives over to our Higher Power as we understand (or don't understand) Him.
Reprinted from Came to Believe, Page 116, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Reliance on my Higher Power enables me to match calamity with serenity. Recovery Related Acronym F A I T H = Further Adventures In Trusting Him/Her. |
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One Day at a Time Friday, Dec. 19, 2008 The Choice is Mine I once encountered many blind alleys, but today, as long as I have faith, my path is clear. This has all been slow progress for me.
Like so many, I do not always surrender completely; I allow the cares and worries of the day distort my thinking. But as soon as I get back on the right track, I realize that I have everything I need. Whatever problems confront me, large or small, they can be solved wisely.
Or they can be solved my way. The choice is mine. Reprinted from Came to Believe, Page 60, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Just for today, I choose not to drink. Recovery Related Acronym H O W = Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness |
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One Day at a Time Saturday, Dec. 20, 2008 Believe I feel that I have been restored to health and sanity these past years not through my own efforts nor as a result of anything I may have done, but because I've come to believe -- to really believe -- that alone I can do nothing. That my own innate selfishness and stubbornness are the evils which, if left unguarded, can drive me to alcohol. I have come to believe that my illness is spiritual as well as physical and mental, and I know that for help in the spiritual sphere I have to turn to a HIgher Power. Reprinted from Experience, Strength and Hope, Page 392, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... What are you coming to believe? Belief is a continuing action. Recovery Related Acronym A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change. |
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One Day at a Time Sunday, Dec. 21, 2008 Highway to Humility As I thus get down to my right size and stature, my self-concern and importance become amusing. Then faith grows that I do have a place on this Highway; that I can advance upon it with deepening peace and confidence. . .
This is a great gift, this knowledge that I do have a destiny.
- Bill W., June 1961. Reprinted from The Language of the Heart, Page 259, from the Grapevine. Reprinted with permission of The A.A. Grapevine, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Humility is not a station we arrive at; it's a way of traveling. Recovery Related Acronym C H A N G E = Choosing Humility Allows New Gifts and Energy. |
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One Day at a Time Monday, Dec. 22, 2008 Unchangeable Fact We try never to lose sight of the unchangeable fact of our alcoholism,
but we learn not to brood or feel sorry for ourselves or talk about it all the time. We accept it as a characteristic of our body -- like our height or our need for glasses, or like any allergies we may have. Then we can learn to live comfortably -- not bitterly -- with the knowledge that as long as we start out by simply avoiding that first drink (remember?)
just for today.
Reprinted from Living Sober, Page 9, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... The first drink has the last say. Recovery Related Acronym J F T = Just For Today. |
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One Day at a Time Tuesday, Dec. 23, 2008 Abundant Hope Hopelessness has been replaced by abundant hope and sincere faith. . .
I find joy in my daily life, in being of service, in simply being. . .
The things that I have learned from my own experience, from the Big Book, and from my friends in AA -- patience, acceptance, honesty, humility, and true faith in a Power greater than myself -- are the tools I use today to live my life, this precious life.
Reprinted from Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 475, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc. Thought to Ponder.... Faith is hope in things unseen. Recovery Related Acronym B I G B O O K = Believing In God Beats Our Old Knowledge. |
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