I know how you feel. Life really sucks sometimes, seems like just when you get ahead 3 steps you fall back 6.
I understand what you mean about feeling the need to connect with your 'spirit guide' to get some direction, to help you discern what is the best way to proceed. It may seem that you are on your own because you can't physically feel your guide's presence or hear guidance...........but never doubt it is there always. This post here proves it.
Your "INTUITION" is your guides voice that is always with you, trust it and follow it as you did when you felt the need to come here and post.........and Never Ever be embarassed about seeking help with anything that's what we are all here for.
You've heard the old "nothing is worth having if you don't have to work for it". I think that is in play for you right now in this relationship. Focus on the "positive's" always.............cherish and make the most of the time you have togeather physically.......connect through the phone or email....Writing is the best way ever to express sincere feelings to another, talking and sharing and learning about each other and ultimitely finding common ground that will indeed help you to overcome the obstacles that keep you apart for now.
Use these resources to help you progress and give your realtionship a chance to grow, negativity and fear will only hold you back and rob you of the opportunities that are there for you to help you to work towards what you seek.
hope this helps hang in there, focus on one day at a time and enjoy the benefits of a positive attitude and the reactions that you receive from it!
take good care
peace...love...light... in unity & respect...classic one