its true you just live for those rare moments of peace when you don't cry over seeing some one w/ a child yours age.when you dont cry when some one elses child has a birthday.been there done that, still do it! It has been three years since Benny died and we had five years of THINGS to go thru. my brothers all had their own lives I still have my daughter. Boy, did I get flack when one day I decided that I wanted his room back and that Benny wouldn't have wanted his bed left unmade[moths and months] and toys around[ neat freak of 5, GET THAT!] so I did it . All I did was strip the bed and put stuff in boxes. but still. I knew when it was time,  no one else. it also helped my anger to pound the bed railings aprt when I finally took that down later. just do what you feel you want. Like they say, no one knows unless they have walked in your shoes. and even then..........

peace, LIS