- What do you call a pumped-up pumpkin? ... A jock o'lantern.
- A sheriff walks into a saloon, and shouts for everyone's attention.
"Has anyone seen Brown paper Jake?", he asks.
"What's he look like?", asks one shoddy looking cowboy.
"Well", replies the Sheriff. "He wears a brown paper hat, a brown
paper waistcoat, a brown paper shirt, brown paper boots, brown
paper pants, and a brown paper jacket."
"So what's he wanted for?", asks the same cowboy.
"Rustlin'... ", replies the Sheriff. - Two robins are lying on their backs, soaking up some sun.
A Mama cat and her kitten come walking by.
The kitten complains, "Mama, I'm sooo hungry, what can we eat?"
The Mama cat, spying the 2 birds replies, "How about some baskin' robins?" - Two guys sitting at a bar, chatting about dogs, and trying to out-do each other:
1st guy : ''I taught my dog to read.''
2nd guy : ''I know. My dog told me that yesterday. - What kind of flowers do you give to King Tut? ... chrysanthemummies.
- If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
- What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? ... Pumpkin pi.
- What do you get when you cross an Indian with a cow? ... Geronimoo.
- What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a kilt? ... Hopscotch.
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