I don't know how long it will take me to walk this last mile of Life! I only know that I don't want to walk this mile alone. I want to see the final chapter of my life to be filled with laughter, companionship, romance bound by a "Partnership" of mutual goals and interests. I know that you and I are different people and I'd never want you to be anyone or anything but you!
I've had a good life and regrets...who doesn't have a few? But lifes journeys are nothing more then "Lessons Learned"... and if we learn from what went wrong in our life, we become better and wiser people in the long run! If I were to look around at the people I see in passing, I see that on the outside, they seem to have found the person of their dreams! How envious I can feel because "Happiness" is the destination of us all! For some though... it just takes "Time" to reach that place!
Life indeed is full of dead-ends, U-Turns, "Bridge Out", Construction Zone Ahead, Reduce Speed Zone, "You get the idea!" The truth of it all is that no one, not me or you can reach our destination sooner then we are supposed to! Life has many a surprise in store for us, and not all are good! But we survive easiest by not taking a "Setback" PERSONALLY! If you arre happy inside yourself, it will "Reflect" in your eyes, in your voice, in how you interact with other's, no matter how shy or apprehensive you may be about the opposite sex!
One thing to me is "Crystal Clear": When the day comes when I "Fall in Love"...my life will be turned upside down!
It won't matter if she is older or younger then me. It won't matter if she is employed, retired, or barely making ends meet! It won't matter if she has less pounds, or more, or if she is tall or short! Those outer features will change over tiime, and if the inner qualities I hope she posses are shining through, "There's a chance that she has what it takes to be there for me when I need her the most! If she believes I possess the inner qualities in a mate she desires, she too may believe I might always be there when she needs me most!
That's all two people who seriously seek a mate hope to find. Oh, sure, we have this idea in our mind of what we would love a partner will look like!
But we both know that is just the hormonal side of Lust talking to us! There will always be "Players & Slayers" of the heart and those are the ones we try our best to avoid! It's hard enough to find the courage to give someone the chance to know us better and to peek inside our heart, without them taking us for granted or advantage of.
The idea of "One day at a time" is a good strategy! Yesterday is the past and we cannot undo what is done! Tomorrow has not arrived so we cannot change or step aside what in reality may be looked upon as "FATE"! We can only look at "Today" because by someone we can do right this moment, can in fact "Change all of our tomorrows to come"! Ask any couple married for years, to look back on how two lonely people became "ONE" and they will almost always smile, and laugh as they tell you how it all began as their eyes sparkle! No one ever forgets that "First moment" that was the beginning of the fourth of July"!
A common mistake too many people make is by "Moving too fast", and being hurt, and then judging all men or all women by how that person hurt us! Bitterness closes the door to any possibility of letting someone consider ALL of our qualities! Sure its safe sometimes to "Build WALLS around us to keep other's from hurting us, but those walls also keep us away from them!" It's complicated making that all important first step toward letting someone get to know us because "We make ourselves "VULNERABLE" and thats a scary feeling!
What if this, and What if that...makes us stay in our comefort zone and when that happens, each new day... is a day spent alone again! So what is the answer you ask? Let your eyes, and your voice, and and your smile become doorways where someone knew can "Stop, and pause a moment" to talk to you. Once you break the ice, one never knows. Maybe nothing will happen, beyond sharing conversation. But if you made a nice impression on them of the type of person you are, the door has been opened. Who knows where it could lead?
One point to keep in mind.... "Each of us have a "General idea" of the type of person we are looking for!" If you are passed up, don't dispair! All that means is "You weren't the person they were looking for! It isn't personal. They just don't want to make a decision that they later might regret. Perhaps someone prefers someone tall! In my case, nothing I can do will change her mind, even if I own a "Ladder" because that is what she is looking for! True, Murphy's Law has a habit of changing her mind, but not often. Just as someone may prefer a Non-Smoker, and someone else smokes!
Habits or addictions do play a role in our choosing who we may give a chance to get to know us better. Financial and health issues are important, and anyone who stops doing something for "Someone else, and not themselves will NOT be happy!" Resentment will build until it bursts! I once knew a gal online who said she used to smoke but no longer did. 4 months later, she admitted in a phone call that she "Only smoked" if she went to a bar, and that she only had (1) smoke"! She was hoping that I would like everything else about her and would, "Over look or tolerate" her smoking. Things broke off then and there! Honesty is a quality that should never be compromised!
Without trust, there is nothing. Many people on and off the web would like one day to meet someone nice, to "Walk that last mile of life with".... and to each of you near and far I wish you safe passage. Love is a wonderful destination and once you reach that destination and have someone special beside you through the years, you know deep inside, "During good times or bad" they will be there for you!
For those who have disabilities and impairments, it can be the scariest thing in the world to think about, "Lowering our defenses" to get to know someone better and they us. All too often, we just make one mistake after another, because of those who prey on the naive and gullible! The pain and disappointment can be devastating. All I can say is for you to be "Optimistic, patient, enjoy life. Build happiness within yourself and that way, someone one day may see the happiness in you.
Best wishes to all.
Raymond