C'mon Down off the Stove, Granny, You're Too Old to Ride the Range

Don't Run Through The Screen Door Honey You'll Only Strain Yourself

 

Forget the Night, Help Me Make It Through the Door

 

For Better or Worse, But not for Long

 

I Can't Love Your Body if Your Heart's Not In It

If She Puts Lipstick On My Dipstick, I'll Fall In Love

 

I Just Fell In Something and I Sure Hope It's Love

 

I Kissed Her on the Lips, And Left Her Behind for You

 

I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here

 

I Ran Over My Dog in My Pickup at the Trainstation Comin' Back From My Mother's Funeral After I Got Out of Jail, In the Rain

 

Never Hit Your Grandma with a Shovel

 

When Your Phone Don't Ring It'll Be Me

 

You're the Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

 

You Stole My Wife, You Horse Thief