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| | From:  «jÓñi» (Original Message) | Sent: 1/12/2009 11:42 AM |
Hi Sara I tried to answer you from Scott's laptop this wknd but his stupid touchpad messed me up. Sometimes when you touch it wrong it goes back to the previous webpage meaning you lose everything you were doing. So I got frustrated and quit! Are you feeling any better today physically? Emotionally? I hope Andrew finds a way to put you first today. At least in a small way! I think this week I'm going to drop the ball on something. I know there's a lot going on but I feel disorganized and not with it. We are having Chane's birthday party here on Sunday and the Pinewood Derby is the following weekend. Scott and I committed to making 40-50 trophies to show this pack that you don't have to spend a lot of money to do things - they were only going to give prize trophies to winners of the races with no participation medal or trophy so we are making participation trophies. Plus my two kids need their cars made. Braeden is making a tooth riding a tongue and Chane is making an acoustic guitar. As usual, we're going for the non-speed categories! And I'm making a lego head cake for C's party in addition to a racetrack and pinata which I hope I can make from their old Lego costumes I made for Halloween a couple of years back - if I can find one, I can just close in one side of the box for a pinata. They are building lego cars for the activity - they are already here so that's one TADA and the last of the invitations are going into school today - the teacher said she'd sneak them to the kids since I didn't go in Friday to get addresses because my ankle was hurting. We will have 16 kids if all come without even inviting all the boys in C's class so I know if we invited them all we'd have too many. Too many for my house and at $4 a car, too many for my finances. Plus there is a boy named Kain in Chane's class who he despises and the teacher said all the kids don't like him - he seems kind of mean but she says he has problems. I'm afraid he would come if I invited all the boys and ruin the party! I have lots of appointments and stuff. I'll be on and off. Today I have to leave here at 11 and don't expect to really be back here long enough to get on the computer until right before I have to get ready for Scouts. I have an ultrasound for my previous leg problem at 12:30 an hour away and Chane has a 3:15 appointment in the other direction so I'll have just enough time to get back from the ultrasound, pick him and Braeden up from school and get them to Gettysburg by 3:15. Hate these kinds of days! Need to look at the rest of my week and figure things out. Did nothing all weekend like a dolt. Slept so much I couldn't sleep last night so I've been up since about 3 even with sleeping meds. Yuck I am already tired for the day and it hasn't started yet! GJ on your decluttering BTW. I think we're going to have a yard sale this year - they are a pain and we never make any money but the kids love having them. So I'm going to go thru the freecycle stuff and start packing things away for that. Maybe it will inspire me to get the two attics, garage and lower basement cleaned out. I'm starting my eating plan today. Scott and I are racing to lose weight. If he loses 20 lbs before I lose 30, he has to clean the entire house including dusting and vacuuming. If I lose 30 first, I have to clean out the basement and dust the gym. Hopefully that will motivate me although I want both done so I win either way. At least if I win, I'll only have to personally do one to get them both accomplished! Starting on water too. First glass almost gone. Figures I start on a running-around day so I'll need to pee constantly but whatever. Back later with a list |
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| | | From: Sara | Sent: 1/12/2009 12:30 PM |
For some reason, I thought that you had the party this past week-end. Good luck with getting all that stuff done! It definitely sounds like you've got your hands full this week. Aw man, what a day! Hope you're able to perk up! That's a great idea on the weight loss :) Good luck to both of you!! I'm here but feeling really blah. We had a weird day yesterday. The girls slept over at Laura's so to wake up with just Timmy was really weird. Delaney napped from 2:30-6:30 or something crazy like that! So, she was up late and have to ask Andrew what time she actually went to bed. She's the only one up with me this morning though. Emily even fell asleep in the van for about 1/2 hr (though she denies that she takes naps. lol) We had some running around, etc. We had a late lunch and snacked all afternoon so we had a snacky/breakfast supper around 8! I slept awful and woke up feeling so foggy and dazed. Oh, daycare kids are here so I should go. I'll be around today, I'm thinking! |
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| | | From: Sara | Sent: 1/13/2009 3:53 PM |
Ah, man, I'm spinning wheels here. I have 4 things to bake that I started yesterday but then the night got hectic and I started feeling really off. I have a huge bunch of things to do before tomorrow's home inspection. it's stressing me out big time. I've totally had it with Andrew and now wonder if buying a house and trying to work on this (though really, there has been NO trying whatsoever) was a huge waste of time. It's so stinkin' frustrating. I'm finally demanding my own time or demanding help around the house and it's totally not happening. So, what now?! I just suck it up and do everything on my own?! I had said this week-end that if Andrew wanted to go to his Amway meeting tonight, he had to give up a sport's night. He said, that won't happen so he'll skip the meeting. Well, looks like he's planning on going to the meeting anyways, this is after a week and a half of him not being available at night to help out with anything. AUGH. So, I'm slowly trying to work my way through all the toys which Andrew was supposed to help me with last night but didn't because he had other work to do. (which also included pricing out a computer for a friend, a nice stab in the back for me.) I'm not getting too far because Timothy is 'helping' so it's a tad frustrating. Plus, there's so much other stuff to do, I can't seem to focus on just the toys. Not to mention all the stress with Andrew. AUGH Soooo, sounds like a fun day, eh!? I need a new plan of attack... the large cubby, I'm going to have EVERY blue box written on and sorted. Even if that means just moving already organized boxes from the smaller cubby to the large one. I think it's got 25 cubby holes? So, that should make a dent. About half of them, maybe even more, are done so it shouldn't take long. After that, then I can throw in the muffins and cookies into the oven and finish washing the dishes. 2 smaller things: load into wash (which means bringing honkin' laundry basket downstairs) and change Timmy's bum... squeeze in another glass of water as well Goal: To have this done in 1/2 hr so we'll say 11:30 |
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| | | From: Sara | Sent: 1/13/2009 4:43 PM |
Augh, didn't quite get it done. The cubbies are done but I know there's still some of those toys lying around but at least I know where they can go! Didn't get T's bum changed nor did I get the muffins in (the cookies took up the oven) or finish washing the dishes (gotta put the dry ones away first.) Load is in the wash though. Going to have some lunch with Timmy and deal with the kitchen a bit. Then, I'm going to try to get T to nap and work hard on the basement. |
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| | | From: Sara | Sent: 1/13/2009 5:57 PM |
Ok, Timmy's asleep. I threw the muffins in the oven and when they were close to being done, I turned it off. Soooo, hopefully they aren't burning! Here's my list with no time limit, just coming back here when I'm done: -put Timmy down (and hope he stays sleeping) -bathroom break -take out muffins -mix up banana bread (just gotta do wet ingredients) -load into dryer -deal with small cubby shelf and make sure every spot is filled Then I take a break. Tentative after break list: -get envelope ready to mail for my parents -clear off dr table which means putting away craft stuff -make choc. cookies -clean up kitchen -decide if I'm driving or walking to pick up kids... if walking, find wood sled and put away stroller, if driving, clear off van |
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| | | From: «jÓñi» | Sent: 1/13/2009 6:35 PM |
Sounds like you're really stressed out. I hope Andrew helps you soon. Is it the daycare inspector coming tomorrow? Why do you have to bake so many things or do you just want to? Well I am dropping balls left and right just like I thought. I need a good list. I had a procedure done yesterday that left me having trouble walking last night but it's better today. Today I've been running errands and trying not to go back to bed. Last night I slept poorly again - I woke up thinking I slept like I was trying to catch fluttering paper whatever that means. That was just my thought. I hope you're doing well with your last list. I'll be back in a bit with mine. |
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| | | From: Sara | Sent: 1/13/2009 7:06 PM |
My list is slow going... timmy woke up when I put him down :( Plus, the baby is really active so that's got me having back and stomach issues. Yes, the daycare person is coming tomorrow at 1:30. But, tomorrow morning D has swimming lessons and I hate leaving big cleaning stuff to the last minute. I starting doing this baking last night. apparently I bake when I'm stressed. lol I'm trying to get a stock of baked goods in the freezer so I can easily pull stuff out for after school snack or for the girls' lunches. I thought you were just getting an ultrasound done on your leg yesterday? Yikes, doesn't sound good. I hope you're able to get some sleep soon. what a pain :( Yeah, Andrew's still being a jerk. He finally responded to an email. He thinks we should talk to a pastor at our church (all along, I've been saying we need to go back to counselling.) But, see, this pastor he suggested is one who ran our small group and who has been known to leave his wife with all the house and kid duties. Uh, yeah, of course Andrew would choose to talk to him cause he knows he'd side with Andrew and not get what I'm going through!! Andrew also emailed to say he forwarded my emails to my parents. I'm so beyond ticked right now. My parents have said that they do NOT want to be involved. Well, they do to an extent but before our separation, they felt they got too involved and want to make sure that doesn't happen again. It comes down to being just mine and Andrew's problem, no one else's. My parents will be beyond ticked that Andrew felt the need to do this. Honestly, I don't know what he's trying to accomplish, if it's to 'tattle' on me or what but I can say that they will likely not have very much sympathy for him as my mom has raised 6 kids mostly on her own as my dad worked a lot and now that my dad works from home, he realizes how much he left on the shoulders of my mom. And he still did a lot of house and yard stuff on week-ends! They know that Andrew does VERY little to help out and feel that he spends way too much time on himself. So yeah, this will not sit very well with them. Andrew says he emailed them so that we could both get some perspective. Um, yeah, the thing is and how it always has been, Andrew will not accept it if my parents' response is somewhat against Andrew. He'll ignore it and try to find someone else who would 'side' with them. Man, why does stuff like this always come up at a time when I need to be working my butt off but get so emotionally and physically drained that I can barely function?! I'm not sure what the heck to do now. I'm not sure where the sled is so I'm likely going to drive. My house is disasterous and Timmy is not helping at all. What I'd really like to do is work at one room at a time but for some reason, that's just stressing me out even more. Plus, I know I'd want to start in the living room but that's where the kids will spend their after school time. I wish there were some rooms I could work on and know that they will not be touched until after my inspection. But, with destructo Timmy, that's not too possible. Ok, enough whining and resting, I have to get moving here. I can hear Timmy colouring with markers and that has me VERY scared. AHHH |
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| | | From: «jÓñi» | Sent: 1/13/2009 7:10 PM |
i got kind of lucky because despite not doing much so far this week, i got a few lucky breaks. my sister volunteered to make the lego guy cake because she really wants to (and it will look better if she does it, she's into cake decorating so she knows all the tricks like using fondant instead of regular icing for a smooth finish). and a scout mom who's dh is a firefighter is going back and forth with me on possibly getting a free firehall for our banquet so maybe i can walk into thursday's committee meeting saying we have a place that has a kitchen (our current situation is a middle school cafeteria with no kitchen access so we'd have to cook in the church kitchen and transport hot food). so i'm making some headway. also got a recipe from a firefighter from an old pack on chicken to cook for 200 people since i was intimidated by that but it seems easy (we shall see) and i just need to put my proposals together in a way that will keep the other committee members from objecting to this or that. if it's professionally done maybe they'll just be grateful it's done and not try to nitpick my ideas! so now i can concentrate on the pinewood derby trophies and chane's bday. and the car which is totaled but i haven't found out yet how much its value was. i feel like i'm being pulled in many different directions at once because there are lots of things going on between the banquet, bday party, c's and b's bdays which both require traditions being upheld of course, pinewood derby cars, pinewood derby trophies, medical stuff from my first accident and second accident both going on at the same time, car stuff from the 2nd accident and other little things like trying to find a horse for cub scout day camp this summer (i think i have a lead on that though). lots of phone calls and stuff but i actually enjoy this type of thing and wish i could find another job where i did this stuff - secretarial but no secretary job around here pays enough to make it worth putting my kids in daycare after school and i doubt there's anything 9-2. my ideal job though, would be doing this kind of thing for a business along with day-to-day stuff like payroll and invoices or whatever. just not accounts receivable or payable! i don't like talking about contracts and stuff! sorry i'm babbling - here's my list tim's bday card invitations to c's class notes to school den meeting done by 11 look at paint to see what we need buy paint and tubing and dowels look for primer in york? call warners han ped re: school note han ped re: urine sample cat food cat litter scott's shampoo cut crown molding into cars prime crown molding figure out bases find stain paint crown molding test tape thingie on one, see if it works paint a windshield, doorframe email craig re: accidents email mary & sarah about camping email debbie about camping check out horse website make sure everything is set for c's bday - doughnut, candle, gift wrapped, hot chocolate with marshmallows, hungry parrot coupons make final lists for c's bday party |
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| | | From: «jÓñi» | Sent: 1/13/2009 7:18 PM |
LOL on the markers. yes a baby with markers is very scary! andrew definitely should not have done that. i hope you can find a neutral party. your parents don't need to be involved. i hope you can continue to be mature even tho he's not being mature. i think you have a lot of stress right now and with not being on the antidepressants it's harder for you to deal with it. once the baby comes hopefully you can go back on meds. not that i'm saying that you are just overreacting because you're not on meds but i know that they helped you deal with andrew when he acted like an idiot before. i know mine are helping me even when it really is something someone else shouldn't be doing, to keep it in perspective. maybe the big kids can watch timmy for you for a bit. i hope. so you can get something done. i remember that age. funny and adorable but NOT easy to get anything done. i miss it now though but if i had one again i'd be feeling the same way you do! you need to find a less stressful way to relax ROFL. j/k i could relax if i could scrapbook but i won't do it because the mess would stress me out more. i was thinking i'd like to turn erik's room into a room just for me but there are so many other uses for it. we wanted to put the playroom cabinets in there so the playroom could be more of a family room but that wouldn't be for a few years. it's such a small room though - i'm not sure i could have a nice scrapbook room and office plus a bed for erik without getting frustrated. i need to prioritize and figure out my list. oh yes, i got an ultrasound and then the dr said, let's try something. so he shoved these tubes into my muscles (i saw blood all over the sheets before the tech covered it up and said "you weren't supposed to see that!") with numbing agents to see if the pain is local or coming from my back. well that left me with mega bruises and pain because he was moving the tubes or needles or something all around in the already very painful area! ack |
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| | | From: «jÓñi» | Sent: 1/13/2009 8:29 PM |
did a little picking up. my mom did come and help me last week - the day after i thought since we had an ice storm. our policy since then has been nothing on the floor. so all of my horizontal surfaces except the floor are covered but it's amazing that it doesn't feel so overwhelming when it's all hip height or higher. and with clear floors, it looks a little neater. anyway, that's how my house looks right now. we are leaving for a rocky apptmt. back later! |
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