hey guys

Hope you all are well.

just wanted to drop you a line and let you know I'm alright.

I have been busy recovering for surgery to restore my hear which was sucessful it's lovely to hear the birds.I still have managed to make it far dispite surgery and compilcations I'm in college going intro my last year after that who knows if all work but I ned to try.You guys especaly rat are a  constence source of strengh that maybe I can atleast finish school.

 

I am starting a very imortant journey today looking  through my medical records hoping to understand how this happened and by this having to wait so long to get a dx and then be told it;s too late to make progress,  there s little they can do for me now but give me pain meds.

I think I also just need to find a way to let it go.Geting dx is hard foreveronme and I'm not saying it not but mine was particular diffcult.6 years I waited.I'm certain the large reason I didn't get dx in time was because of that.Imagine being 14 and being sick already and then having to fight that battle problem was cerebral palsy makes you tired so I just didn't hyave it in me to fight much I left that up to my parents.I came very close to be committed as the doc told my parents that I was nuts that I was doing this to myself as all adopted kids are nuts.I think that hard for me to remember the position my parents were in tug of war.Doing whatthey could to help but there wasn't much they could do when all test came back negtive.

6 years all I could do was go to school, come home, sleep, dinner,homework,then back to bed that was my life.Much of my time at highschool I don't remember because I suffer from blackouts because my body couldn't handle the pain I guess.I didn't have the energy to do anythingelse so I   had no teenage years whateso ever.I am greatful that ratlover gets  a normal teen experience as well as all the crap, that warms my heart.It's sad that doc in the country couldn't figure it out because one syptom didn't fit my age and for that my life gets destroy I really do find that funny in some twisted way.

Finnally get dx was such a happy time because I finally had an answer.It strange howe theses answers make you feel more in control.. I'm hoping the same thing will happen will going through the records.

 

take care and I'll let you know if I find anything intersting