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| | From:  RUSTY9120 (Original Message) | Sent: 3/11/2006 5:39 PM |
NOT ALL ABUSE , IS EITHER SEXUAL , OR PHYSICAL, THERE IS A TYPE OF ABUSE , THAT IS OFTEN NOT SPOKEN OF. I CALL THIS, RESCUE ABUSE, IT HAPENS WHEN WE HAVE BEEN SUBJECTED TO ABUSE, AND THEN BEEN ""RESCUED" BY A PARTNER, UNNOWINGLY WE CAN BECOME SO GRATEFULL TO OUR "RECUER" THAT WE LITERALY , PLACE OUR LIVES IN THEIR HANDS, NOW, I,M NOT BLAMING THE RESCUER HERE, BUT WHAT I AM SAYING IS , IF WE GIVE OVER ALL OUR PERSONAL POWER TO ANOTHER, EVENTUALY ,THAT PERSON ABSORBS THE ENERGY THAT COMES FROM THE POWER, AND USES IT TO BOOST THEIR OWN ENERGY, THIS IS A NORMAL REACTION......BUT.... THE PROBLEM IS, AS GRATEFUL AS YOU MAY FEEL TO YOUR "RESCUER" YOU HAVE ONCE AGAIN PLACED YOURSELF IN THE "VICTIM" POSITION. SO OF THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU, .....TAKE STOCK, THINK OVER WHAT YOUR DOING, ...YES... BE GRATEFUL TO HAVE A CARING COMPANION, BUT REMEMBER YOUR PERSONAL POWER IS YOURS, TRUE, HELP IS GIVEN UNCONDITIONALY, FROM THE HEART CENTRE, AND EXPECTS NO RETURN. |
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Rusty,
I know exactly where you are coming from on this one.
For years I was abused in one way or another, then i met Ron.
So grateful was I that he wasnt "like all the others" that I placed myself in his hands.
Only now am I realising what I have done, I gave him my life, he didnt want it but I gave it to him anyway, big, big mistake.
Now as im getting more used to the fact that he wont hurt me, bit by bit im taking it back.
He knows all of this and although he never really had it in the first place i feel bit by bit hes giving it back.
Eventually I will hold my head up and say my life is mine.
Our lives are our own, nobody else should have it, nobody else should ever be in charge of it.
But sometimes we just need someone to gently give us a nudge in the right direction, catch us when we stumble and then help us on our way again.
Ron has done this for me and bit by bit im realising.
My life is mine.
Sue |
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From behind these walls I hear your song
Oh, sweet words
The music that you play lights up my world
The sweetest that I’ve heard
Could it be that I’ve been touched and turned
Oh Lord, please finally, finally things are changing
Chorus:
This land is mine but I’ll let you rule
I let you navigate and demand
Just as long as you know this land is mine
So find your home and settle in
Oh, I’m ready to let you in
Just as long as we know this land is mine
After all the battles and the wars
The scars and loss
I’m still the queen of my domain
And feeling stronger now
The walls are down a little more each day
Since you came, finally, finally things are changing
Follow the days I’ve traveled alone
In this cold and colorless place till now
It’s what I had to pay
This land is mine and I let you rule
I let you navigate on demand
Just as long as you know this land is mine |
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I know what you mean, when my hub and me used to argue he used to say, "at least I don't hit you like he did" as if I had to be eternally grateful that he didn't. Because one man hit me, it neither gave the right for another man to do so, or to be grateful to him that he didn't. I've come to realise how easy it is to be manipulated without even realising whats happening to you, how you can be made to feel as if your the one thats in the wrong when your not. I refuse to put up with this any more. I was badly hurt a few months ago and even though I still hurt inside I'm getting stronger every day, I'm refusing to put up with it any more, no more lies, deceit or manipulation. Because you love someone, this does not give them the automatic right to treat you like this. We all deserve better than this and I'm going to have it. I'M GOING TO RESCUE MYSELF Bev x x x |
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Good on you Bev.
Cos in the end you are the only one who can, be strong.
Sue |
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OH OUR ((BEV)) HOW PROUD OF YOU I AM, WHEN "RESCUING" SOMEONE , WE SHOULD DO IT WITH NO EXPECTATION OF REWARD, IF IT IS DONE WITH THE EXPECTATION OF NONE STOP GRATITUDE, THEN TO ME IT,S SIMPLY THE OTHER PERSON NEEDS, WHAT IS KNOWN AS "POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT" IN OTHERS WORDS CONTINUAL PRAISE, NOW AS MUMS WE DO ALL FOR OUR CHILDREN , YET WE EXPECT , LITTLE IN RETURN, , WATCH THE LOVE A DOG WILL GIVE YOU , SIMPLY FOR YOUR LOVE A LITTLE FOOD AND WATER, THAT IS TRULY , NON-JUDGEMENTAL LOVE, SO BEV YOU GO GIRL , WELL DONE  |
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