(((((Graceful))))) Your story reminds me of mysef and my daughter. The only advice I know is to try your very best to accept her as she is. She is still your mother. Bipolar is just an illness she has. And learn everything you can about the disorder. Read the information, post, go to chat and talk about it. You seem like a real caring and kind daughter. I hope and pray that all goes well with your visit. Love and hugs, Rain.

Graceful, I think you are  headed in the right direction when it comes to understanding your Mom. It seems that you are open minded and realize that some of the things she does is the illness and not your Mom. It took my daughter a long time. She was in denial for so long; but I think she finally realized that I would not have done or said some of the things I did if I were not sick. She finally began to see my symptoms when I was getting manic or real depressed. She even sat in on a session or two with me and my pdoc. I had to learn to take responsibility for my actions even though I have this disorder and to take my meds the way I am supposed to. One thing we have not resolved is that she thinks I am on too much  medication. She just thinks I would be better off with less meds because of some of the side effects. She also doesn't like it when I'm not up to par for family events because of my bipolar. But I'm doing a lot better in that area. It just takes time and understanding and that will come for you and your Mom if you are patient and take it one step at a time. I'm very glad that you joined us and I hope that you learn a lot to help you and your Mom. Hugs and prayers, Rain.