I am sorry for all that you are going through and I am happy that you want to do wghat you can to help her.

 I am your daughters age and it is tough to have rsd period but in someway tougher when you get it younger because you can't go to school And get the job that you want which just adds to the frustration because you want to feel like a normal person that what most of this is about.We want to be self reliant it seems to be the only thing help that we have any control over.I grew up with this no control over almost anything so I fight for whatever control I can get  no mattter how it annoys others.Just know that she is not doing this to annoy you I am the same way with most things.

You could try telling her that you know that she is doing the best she can and you just want to help her with what she can not finish ask her what you can do instead it may be that she just wants you to be just talk to her.

Part of the problem maybe that she can feel your frusration that she acts like she not trying and that makes it worse. when my dad acts that way and then of course I won't let my dad do anything because I feel he not see that I am doing the best that I can possiably do.

I know that this diffcult for your entire family you just need to try to comunicate with each other and try to be patient during theses difffcult times and knopw you guys are doing the best you can

take care

mirage