How to Breathe for Sex: Arousal breathing helps you to feel more

by Petra Zebroff

Increasing Arousal Breathing helps you to relax and feel more. Really! When we are tense or anxious our bodies prepare us to run away from or fight a stressful situation. Although modern life has few tigers to run away from anymore, our bodies still respond as if we do.

A worrisome business meeting or an overdue bill can cause muscles to tense up, breathing to become shallow and blood flow to be shunted AWAY from the skin to more vital areas such as muscles and heart.

Basic breathing techniques help to increase sexual arousal by telling the body to stop the stress response and bring blood flow back into the skin. With more blood (which brings oxygen, stimulation, energy and warmth) the skin becomes more sensitive. And part of where we need it most, the genitals.

Step 1: Become aware of your tension.

The first step is to become aware of your tension. Tense muscles of the stomach and pelvis do two things: block proper breathing and block blood flow to sensitive areas. You cannot get breath properly or get aroused if your abdominal or pelvic muscles are tight. 1. Sit comfortably 2. Consciously tense your stomach. Relax. Do this a few times to become aware of any stomach tension. 3. Now, do the same thing while you breathe out. 4. When you reach the point where you need air relax your muscles and breathe in. Step 2: Deep Belly Breaths.

The natural state that encourages sensation, relaxation and arousal is a deeper breath than the shallow ones we rely on normally. 1. Lie on your back with your legs bent, feet on the floor. 2. Take one breath in for four seconds feeling the air fill the entire lung and down into the belly. Let the belly expand. Push out the belly as much as you can. Wait four seconds. 3. Breathe out letting the belly deflate first, then the lungs. Force out every last bit of breath. Do this four times.

Step 3: Bring focus to your genitals.

Practice breathing deeply to draw blood flow and awareness to the areas of the body vital to sexual pleasure.

Include your pelvic muscles. You will bring oxygen, warmth and energy to all the right places: a. Consciously tense your PC muscles. Hold for a few seconds (as if you are stopping the flow of urine). Relax. Do this a few times to get used to the feeling. b. Now, tense the PC muscles while you breathe out. Hold for a few seconds. Relax the muscle while you inhale. Relax. Repeat 5 times.

Breathe into the genitals.

Imagine as you breathe in that the breath is going into the pelvis. This may seem a little silly as the breath doesn't actually have a place to go that far down but it is the awareness of the area that does wonders for bringing heat and sensation to the genitals. Your genitals should tingle a little and you should feel "in your body".

Increase Orgasm Intensity Mimic your orgasm reflex:

1. Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet on the floor. 2. Arch the small of your back, pressing the tailbone down into the floor. Inhale as you arch (3-4 seconds). 3. Breathe out as you flatten small of back to the floor, tilting the tailbone up to the ceiling (3-4 seconds). Relax. Let your throat go and sigh loudly. Ahhhh. Make more sound than you naturally would.

Now, speed up your movements. Your breath no longer will coordinate with your movements. Keep breathing full and long in and out for 5 long breaths while you let your body gyrate, allowing the movements to become faster and almost random. Let your body do whatever feels best.

Increase Intimacy and Sexual Connection

Partnered Breathing. Breathing together can increase intimacy and bring lovers in synch with their partner.

1. Soulful Gaze. Sit on the floor facing your partner. Look into each other's eyes. This is not a staring contest, when your eyes get tired close them or look away for a few seconds. Let it happen.

a. Close your eyes for a few minutes while you bring your attention to your own breath. Pay attention to how your chest expands, how your belly moves up and down or how your pelvis naturally tilts. b. Open your eyes, make eye contact and now pay attention to your partner's breath. Expand your gaze to include their chest. See how it rises and falls. Expand your gaze to include his belly, then pelvis. All the while keeping some eye contact. c. Have your partner breathe normally. Become aware of his/her breath. Follow it. Breathe in rhythm for a few minutes. Play with your breath together. Don't force it. When you fall out of synch with each other just let it happen. Dance with each other's breath.

2. Synchronized Breathing. Lie in a spoon position. Relax, get comfy. Breathe naturally. a. Bring your attention to your partner's breath. Become aware of how their breath sounds. Sense how the breath feels next to your body. Become aware of the rhythm and the depth of their breath. b. Have the person who is positioned in front lead by initiating the pace of the breath. Take one long breath in filling the lungs and belly letting it rush out of you with a big sigh. Ahhhhh. c. Have the person in behind follow the rhythm and depth of the breath. Do this a few times. d. Change roles so the person in the back leads. Repeat