I have enjoyed deep friendships with both male and female friends, although there have been more males than females. Why? I'm not sure if it has something to do with the pragmatic logical way I think, or the fact that sometimes females tend to be more needy and territorial than male friends, or maybe it's just that females tend to play games at times and be less than honest while men may be more likely to be blunt and to the point. Like I said, I have friends of both genders that have stood the test of time so there are certainly benefits to both genders. One of the major problems is the way friendships with the opposite sex are perceived by others. Some people don't believe that you can have a deep friendship with the opposite sex and keep it appropriate. So what's appropriate anyway??? If I have a single male friend, and we enjoy intellectual and emotional intimacy then what's wrong with that?? I have had a few male friendships that went to the physical level, and then went back down to a friendship level, and we are still friends to this day. It didn't start as a romance, it started as friends, went up a level, we didn't feel that it was what we wanted, so we took it back down. Is that so wrong??? AND we are still friends to this day with no intention of having the physical intimacy again.
I have other male friends, 2 right now that I feel that I can tell anything too, they understand me and I understand them, they know me and I know them, and it's extremely comfortable. There's never been a hint of anything but just friendship nor will there ever be. My best friend is male and I can honestly say that I love him deeply. It's a friendship that I would fight for. I think that when people limit themselves for the sake of propriety they are denying themselves the potential for something great. Soul mates come in different forms, it's not always a physical "I must have you" kind of thing. We can have more than one, and more than one at a time.
I think there are different reasons why friends come and go out of our lives. Circumstances change, one's circle of friends changes, we go from single to part of a couple or part of a couple back to single and that changes who our friends are sometimes. One of my best friends of all times got married and it changed our friendship as his new wife was quite insecure with our friendship and demanded that he stop associating with me. I went with the flow on that one and let go of the friendship because it was the right thing to do for all involved.
I love having friends and soulmates, and I've been so fortunate in my life to have had many. Life is good.....
coco