That's real interesting so far Prem...I haven't seen you for a while...good to read about you.  I seem to connect a lot with what you have said so far....about childhood depression....well, I am awaiting more of your story....

Pearl

You are a true lover of God Prem!  I understand your background and traditions and why your parents are keeping the brakes on you.  I gather you are a teenager?  Actually I do remember asking you that question, many moons ago now....saying you seemed much older than what you said you were.  You write with much depth and wisdom for a teenager.  YOu write like an old soul who has the gift of knowledge much beyond your human years.

 

Could it be that you are in love with God, your yearning to be free being in The Presence makes you feel being held.  This is quite common feeling among lovers of God/Krishna.  Wanting to merge with our God and live in this Sanctum for ever and ever. 

 

That's what life is all about....wanting to return to this Oneness with God/Krishna. 

 

Your boyfriend who lives in another town.  Do you see him often?  I understand your situation of being closely match by your parents at all times.  Are you in love fully and surely with him, rather than the idea of having a mysterious lover who might take you away from your family some day in the near future, even to another country.  Just asking these questions for myself.

 

I do hope I do not offend by asking you these questions.  You seem to be so depressed that I am trying to see how I can be of some assistance in connecting with you on the level you are writing.  You are very open and sharing willing.  I do appreciate this about you.

 

Thank you so much for bringing us (me) into your world Prem.

May you feel Krishna always in your heart.

Pearl

No bad karma....it's just the fact of life, we get stones in our path and we stumble, then we pick ourself up and get on once again.  This goes for this life and the one before and on and on. 

 

What you think though has repercussions.  So just think that whatever you bring to this life from past lives is not going to drag you down....the reason why you bring it to this life....is to do better this time....and get on .....no bad karma at all....it is all good and for a purpose.

 

hee, no bad karma.....

 

  That's soothing. . Thank you Pearl, you're definately bringing out the brighter sides of things for me, I'm more than grateful and I mean that sincerely.

Hope this shows up Prem it reminded me of you.