Being commander of the  XT Project, I thought would be wise in the galatic intrest to visit the XT-1 to get first hand report about the ant men on the moon.  I ordered a heavily armed scout ship called Hawk1 and  requested a science officer to accompany me.  Within 1 hour I entered Hawk1 with my most trusted navigation droid Pi-E.  While we were waiting for our science officer, we charted our mission to the XT-1 and locked in the position of the ship.  Our science officer arrived and by the Sword and Roses insignia, I knew we had one of the top person in Galactic Science.  We left the space dock and went into hyper drive and we watched as it looked like an explosion of stars went by.  In less than 5 minutes we had covered 879,251 miles and we were within a mile of the XT-1 when we went into sonic drive.  I used hailing frequency 39.21.5:

Hawk1:  XT-1 this is Hawk1.  We request to preparing for docking proceedure.

XT-1:  Hawk1, this is Captain Camper and we welcome you General Gray and your crew.

Hawk1:  Thank you, Captain Camper.  We are standing by behind the XT-1awaiting for the opening of the docking          portal.

XT-1:  We are opening the portal.

Pi-E:  General, that is not the docking portal opening.

Gen. Gray:  DOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Pi-E:  It is the chemical toilet dump port.

Gen. Gray: Pi-E takes us into earth's atmosphere in Hyper drive and at 200,000 feet pull back up into outerspace.

By going into hyper drive into earth's atmosphere,  The friction burned all the waste material on our ship to ash and blew off like dust.  Back in outerspace we approached the XT-1 again, more cautiously this time.  Of courseCaptain Rosie as we called her was laughing so hard, she almost gave herself a lobotomy with the surgerical laser she had with her science kit.

Gen. Gray:  Hawk1 to XT-1.  Captain Camper if you are finished empting your toilets, could you open the docking port!!!!

Captina Camper:  Yes Sir!  Immediately.  We seem to have a slight malfunction.

Gen. Gray:  I have seen your malfunction and unless you want to see it first hand on the end of a tether, Get the docking portal open.

We waited in a defensive posture until we saw the docking portal opened and then Pi-E  guided the ship into the dock.  We disembarked Hawk1and was greeted by the chief engineer, 1st Lt. Bigguy, and Captain Camper.  I introduced Captain Rosie and asked Bigguy if he would take care of Pi,  Bigguy hit the deck as Captain Camper yelled "pie" and left a big glob of slobber on my uniform.  I was lucky, Captain Rosie being a bit shorter than myself looked like she slimed by a can of mousse.  After going to the officer's quarters to get dried out and new uniforms, we proceeded to the Galley where we had a a fantastic meal prepared by the famous galatic chef, Chef Trina.  The meal more than made up for the rather wet welcome we recieved.  I offered Chef Trina a place on my staff if  she ever wanted a transfer.  Next, in the captain's quarters amid a number of coffee cups and dirty dishes laying all around the quaters, I got first hand reports from Lt. Sugar Mags and Captain Camper.  After consulting with Captain Rosie, I decided that I should investigatethe moon and the ant men myself.  I asked for one volunteer from the XT-1 crew to serve as a guide and  a tall, willowy yeoman called Val volunteered.  Captain Camper pulled me aside and advised me her nickname on the ship was "Amen" and he didn't elaborate further.  Myself, Rosie, Val, and Pi-E entered the Hawk1 and prepared for take off.  We left the dock and stayed in sonic drive since the moon was only a mere 2,000 miles away. We landed on the moon and rosie and myself put on a new neutron  force field suits that had just been developed. Unfortunately, the other suit was to small for Val, but we could protect her with our force fields if we held on to her berfore we turned ours on. we disembarked the Hawk1 and as Val took the lead walking in front of us and "Amen" escaped my lips and I was beginning to understand why she was given that nickname.  Val guided us to the crater and we decended into it's depths.  Since Val did not have a forece field suit Rosie and I held her tight between us.  Within 200 yards we encountered the Ant Men. we turned on our force fields as the firt wave lunged at Rosie, The force field threw the first wave into the following legions knocking them down like pins in a bowling alley.  We continued past the Ant Men lying down all around us stun as if hit by a cattle prod.  we had covered about another 100 yds when we saw what looked like a royal procession. It stopped in front of us and the Queen Ant stepped to the front.  She was making clicks and huffing sounds that reminded me of the language of the Kalahari bushmen of Central Africa.  I turned my translator on to the language of the Bushmen and sure enough we were communicating.  The Queen advised that they thought we were here to steal their emergency water reserves that they had frozen and stored here.  I advised the Queen that we had no intentions of taking their water as long as they did not approach the earth no further than this moon.  The Queen was pleased with our mutual respect for each other and presented Rosie with a skycycle which was extremely fast and could lift tons of weight.  The Queen invited Rosie to her chambers to give her information about the history of their society and being the Science Officer, she accepted.  Val and I were given a tour of their facilities.  Val was enamored of the impurities storage area since it seems the impurities they extracted from their water was chocolate.  Val had just made a deal with the Ant People to dispose of all their impurities which would make her chocolate queen of our universe.  I recieved an urgent call on my communicator from Pi-E advising me that the XT-1 was under attack from the Trellians.  I advised our crew to meet at the edge of the crater immediately.  I thanked the Ant People for their hospitality and told them we had an emergency.  As i was walking to the crater entrance I was almost flattened by a blur. It was rosie on her new skycycle.  Val was at the crater entrance waiting with what seem to be samples of the impurities on her face.  The Hawk1 picked us up and we went into hyperdrive to the position of the XT-1.  When we arrived there was a real dogfight going on and though the XT-1 fighters that wer launched were outnumbered, they were holding their own.  Then I noticed the Trillian Battle cruiser slipping up behind the XT-1.  I comunicated with the Fighter Squadron Leader who was flying our advanced laser weapon craft 'Sharpfinger" that was able to slice throufh enemy craft with it's powerful laser beam.

Gen. Gray:  Lt. Lee this is Hawk1

Lt. Lee:  Yes sir!  I have a clear transmission.

Gen. Gray:  Lt. Lee can your fighters hold the enemy craft in front of the XT-1?

Lt. Lee:  Yes sir!  we are containing them in a tight area and we have taken no casualties as yet.

Gen. Gray:  Hold them five more minutes and then get out of blast range of the XT-1.  I have a plan to take out that battle cruiser.

Lt. Lee:  Will do.

Gen. Gray:  Hawk1 to XT-1

Captain Camper:  Yes sir!  Glad you could join us General.

Gen. Gray:  Capt. Camper , there is a battle crusier lining up on the rear of your ship.  Your ship can not withstand the Trillium Death Ray.  You have only one chance and you have to follow my orders to the letter.

Capt. Camper:  What is your plan?

Gen. Gray:  On my command do a loop at hyper speed when you get to the top of loop go into neutron drive  and when you come in behind the battle crusier, hit it with everything you have in your arsenal.  I will try to come in from below the cruiser and try to disrupt their power long enough for you to destroy it.

Capt. Camper:  Will do!

Iwent into hyper speed dropping below the engagement area.  since this manuver was going to take split micro second timing, I made Val our weapons officer.  I told Val to face the armament console and to push the button marked arm. Val advised she had armed the weapons.  I advised her that there were four buttons marked EMPT and to place her four fingers at the ready.  I had to turn off Pi-E because this manuver was not in his program and made Rosie co-pilot.  I advised Val when i said fire press all the buttons at once.  I advised Rosie to hold the stick back as hard as she could.

Gen Gray:  XT-1  Go!!!

As the XT-1 disappeared from sight, Rosie and I pulled the stick back all the way going into a vertical climb.  We were directly under the Battle  cruiser and closing fast.  I yelled, "Fire" and four Electro-magnetic Pulse Torpedoes sped for the target.  We then made a barrel roll to the left away from the cruiser and I saw that Lt. Lee was making good time getting away from blast zone.  Val had done it!  All four torpedoes hit the battle crusier and we watched as the lights of the cruiser flickered on and off.  The XT-1 appeared right behind the battle cruiser and lit up the sky as it blasted the Trellian battle cruiser into billions of tiny particles.

Gen.Gray:  Congratulations Capt. Camper!  Good shooting.

Capt. Camper:  Couldn't have done it if you hadn't disrupted their force field.

Gen. Gray:  Open the the docking portal and I will see you in about two minutes.

Capt. Camper:  Docking portal open and welcome aboard!

We docked the Hawk1 and exited the ship. I looked back and noticed a dark brown stain in the weapons officer's seat and I hoped that it was made from a pocket full of chocolate.  As we walked toward the officer's quarters, I had to chuckle under my breath because the whole crew was yelling, "Amen" and I was not sure if they were giving thanks because of their close call or they were happy to see Val.  One of the fighter had sustain some damage during the dogfight and Rosie volunteered to retrieve the craft with her skycycle.  Rosie took off out of the portal so fast she almost took Capt. Camper with her.  After freshing up in the officer's quarters, we went to the Galley where Chef Trina made  a fantastic meal of Pot Roast with all the trimmings.  As I was sitting at the table about ready to stick my fork in the most beautiful piece of strawberry cake I ever saw, Capt. Camper said to me, "I thought you brought pie".   DOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

                                                       Chapter 5