friends of 40s5

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How do you deal with friends disputes...?

When I was a teen I remember getting involved in the "he said/she said" routines...All my friends would choose one side or the other...The battle lines would be drawn....It was constant..highly emotional and destructive....

I had always assumed that it was a phase..Now I'm not so sure

Since becoming an adult...(more specifically in the past few years)...I've decided that I won't allow myself to get in the middle of these confrontations..If mutual friends are fighting between one another...they are told to keep me out of it...I don't want to hear any of the details..

I try to only judge people.. (and yes..I believe we all judge)...on how they've behaved towards me...not because of what so and so may say about them..or something they've done to someone else....If I lose a friend because of it...so be it..

Do you allow other people to tell you who you should be friends with, or sway your decisions as far as a potential new friend?

Do you find you still take sides?

Are you like me and just stay out of it?

HI BIGGIE, I WAS JUST COMING TO THE CONCLUSION THAT THIS PERSON WASN'T A FRIEND TO BEGIN WITH WHEN I READ AT THE END THAT YOU TO CAME TO THIS CONCLUSION. I AGREE WITH YOUR DECISION. YOU HAD TO MAKE A DIFFICULT DECISION & A FAIR ONE.

All my friends know that I will not be drawn into that situation..I will not be made to chose one friend over another..as I probably came to be friends with each one for a different reason.If they are the true friends I believe them to be and so far they have been, they will respect my decision and understand my stance.

Good question brought up here....I really hate it

I keep out of disputes and have had many of my friends argue...which is really sad...but I stay friends with both..

Some have got upset that I spent time with so and so ..........and the friendship has distanced...but i wont be bullyed into who I can and cant talk to ...as I wouldnt do that to them....

My theory is...as long as I am not hurting anyone in anyway....I plod along in life doing what I do........

Sometimes I think its a woman thing...they are either possessive of their friends or their hubbies...

I can understand sometimes some women being possessive or a lil insecure of their men ( and I would never do anything to hurt my friends in any way)...

but to be insecure or possessive of friendships??

NOPE - I wont put up with that!!!!

They should KNOW my character and personality

Important Announcement The MSN Groups service will close in February 2009. You can move your group to Multiply, MSN’s partner for online groups. Learn More
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