Sarge and Lt. Linda

Saga # 97

Now Lt. Linda is a nice little Alabama gal and of more or less even temperment. Not to say she doesn't get her back up every now and then but the most that happens is she tosses a few dishes on the floor. Nothing real violent. And she hasn't hit Sarge yet with a dish. Real poor shot. But the other night she had Sarge wondering what happened to his sweet little Southern Belle. It happened like this.

Sarge is sleeping peacefully, dreaming about deer and elk, guns and bows and classic cars. His usual dreams. OK throw in a couple of long haired blonds in there sometimes. And that was what was on Sarges sleeping mind when all of a sudden Lt. Linda JUMPS OUT OF BED! And grabs a big stick (broom) and standing over a sleepy eyed Sarge raises it over her head and STRIKES! the ceiling two or three times.

NO Honey, I didn't buy a new gun, honest! mumbles Sarge, and I don't even know the blondes name. WHAP WHAP WHAP, she lands blow after blow, all of them missing Sarge as she hits the ceiling time after time. Then the now wide awake Sarge sees a black spot in front of his eyes. Coming closer and closer and closer.

A BIG BLACK SPIDER!! And he is jumping to freedom from LT. Linda's frantic blows! And of course Sarge is right under his landing zone.

Thanks to Sarge's terrific physical condition and exceptional reflexes he leaps out of the bed, knocking everything off the night stand. But he avoids Lt. Linda's death blow landing right where he was laying and unfortunately right where the now deceased spider lays smashed.

"Gulp" thinks Sarge, that could have been me. Don't mess with this little lady.

But there is nothing more fun then making a bed with your lady at 2 am in the morning. Especially if you wrinkle it up a few times and have to make it again. A happy ending if I ever seen one.

Sarge the almost victim.