Hi Mal.welcome to the site. This site has helped me keep my sanity and learn about my daughters very sad but strange condition.every day I live and learn.

Hi maligned. I'm glad you've found your answers. As bad as they are it does give us some understanding.

 

I watch as my X N fromhell stepson is able to con people most magnificently as Dr. Vaknin says. It really is an art, but it's the motivation of their lives and to see it on high watching like a hawk circling and watching, but protected from whatever he does is all one can do.  Very sad.

 

I'm glad the others have learned about him too. I wish that would happen in this family I talk about, but he's too good.   

Hi femfree, thanks for the comment.  We adopted my son @ birth, and back then I really believed children were blank slates.  But nothing I tried made a dent on his personality or behavior.  I went to therapy thinking I was subconciously treating him "different" from the biological children I have.  Twin studies who were seperated at birth have been so helpful!  Even with diametrically opposing backgrounds, they remain so similar!  I suggested at age 15 that he seek his b. mother.  He was NOT interested.  Well, she died the year he left us, and since then he has met his b. grandmother and half siblings, and I see him beginning the grooming process toward them.   I pray often that God will help them see him for what he is.  I even prayed this Christmas that God would help my in-laws see the disappointment on his face with what they bought him.  (nothing's ever good enough...sigh)