Vera, one of the steps of grief is anger and it is a part of healing for some kind of loss.  And when we lose our children that is a big loss.  One thing I do know is my son is a P.  He meets all the signs of a P.  We have no major bitterness between us except his criminal behaviour.  I can not accept that as a choice in his life.  He has not abused me in any other way than to take my many years of love and patience and blow it on putting himself in danger with his criminal acts.  That is what hurts me deeply.  Not all P's come from abuse or parents who do not love them or treat them tenderly.  Some come from good people and that gets lost in the world of those who treat the P's when the get arrested or end up in the system somehow.  And the P's play that to the hilt.  I have been accused of all kinds of things that never happened but my P plays those lies up to get mercy in the justice system.