Hi keepbeingtrue,

My 15yr ?P has just recently said to me that it is all my fault that he is the way he is and look at what we have done to him and how we have ruined his life-------I sat and thought about this for so long and all this guilt suddenly hit me but then reality took over when I looked at what he had, and still is, putting us through---there are no excuses for his behaviour. On the surface I am polite to him and that is it. I show him no attention or affection and now dont even react when he does something awful. At first I felt guilty for not punishing him but I know he does not learn from punishment and he sees emotions in me when I react to his behaviours and punish him. I find it so difficult not reacting to him.

My 18yr P and I have had NC for nearly 2 years apart from a few phone calls. We now live the other side of the world from him and as difficult as it has been, I have peace of mind. I know he can no longer hurt me. If we had stayed in the UK I honestly do not know how I would have coped because it would never, ever end as he would always be there just like my 15yr old----and I cant see a way out with him.

NC for me is definately the only way forward, the only way I can have some life. I pray for the day when my 15yr old is out my life and I can move forward again.

Kel