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All Message Boards : Letter from NP daughter serving in Iraq
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 Message 1 of 7 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameaplsauce03  (Original Message)Sent: 2/11/2008 10:27 p.m.
My NP daughter sent me this from Iraq after a year of no contact after assaulting and threatening to kill me in Aug. of 2007. I added some commentary in ( ). She perfumed this letter, just for an "extra touch".

I've thought about writing a letter for a while, but honestly, I didn't know what to say. Every night the words came so easy, but when I finally sit down I go blank.
I want you to know that I forgive you. (I guess that's for having her arrested after the assault). You may not feel that you have done anything to merit forgiveness, but there are some things that I feel differently about. I forgive you for everything, Mom. And I am deeply sorry if I have ever hurt you in anyway. People do things for many different reasons. And if in my actions, out of feelings of anger or betrayal hurt you-again-I truly am sorry.
You probably guessed I am in Iraq. It's going to be alot different this time around. 14 hour workdays. Guarding prisoners. 3 minute showers. And there is a haze of tan that infects everything. There is no sun. There is no moon. Not a single piece of green. Just varying degrees of tan. (isn't that sad, welcome to my world, only you colored it black). It's almost sad. And with the work schedule, I will probably not be able to finish school. (Hmmm, no kidding, she's 24 she hasn't even started let alone finish, plus she's already given herself one more excuse). I was really looking forward to that. However everything set aside, I am trying to stay positive. I don't want this place to eat me from the inside out like it threatened to do last time. (Must be difficult keeping the mask on that long, but she has no choice tensions are high and they're are also armed). Oh, and I'm hoping to join the "Praise Team" at the Chapel. But, like I said, who knows with the schedule. (One more excuse).
John and I are fine. (her husband she married the day before she had to report for training for Iraq. The 5th time she met him was the wedding day, we haven't met him. She told him I would "eat him alive", however her other boyfriends that weren't brainwashed into believing we abused her actually like us. They have never lived together and lived about 1000 mile away with a phone courtship). We talk everyday and still managed to not have a single argument. (he's in for a BIG surprise when she returns). It is difficult, though. We miss each other terribly. I really wish you could've met him. (He may have learned that she's a liar if that ever happened). He's everything you could've ever wished for me including the whole blonde + blue eye thing. Right now he's working on becoming a Paramedic. He's already a licensed EMT, but he wants to do something a little more. I'm quite proud of him. He works his cute little butt off. I'm sure that I could go on and on about him, but all that really matters is: I'm happy. We bring out the best in each other. And we take our marriage VERY seriously. (I'm sure).
I'm sure that I will write again, as I continue to feel some sort of obligation to let you know that I'm alright. (She didn't have that problem before she left). However, I ask that you don't go out of your way to write back. (I have no address). Simply put, I am not ready for a relationship with you. I am sorry if you felt that being here might change my mind, but it hasn't. (Actually I was just glad she was far away). I may never be able to have a relationship with you, but time changes things. No one knows the future.
Please know that regardless of whether or not I see you again (as if she's in control of that anymore), I will always love you. You always have been, and always will be my Mother. (At least she left out the F'ing). And at some point, when I look back to the past, you have been my best friend. Take care and know that I think of you often.
Love, --------------


I couldn't even begin to make up that crap, she also put me on the FRG (family readiness group) list. I took myself OFF. Then the other day she tried to IM me. I denied it. I want her to stay away. She must really need "SUPPLY". I have none




First  Previous  2-7 of 7  Next  Last 
Reply
 Message 2 of 7 in Discussion 
From: suzanneSent: 3/11/2008 7:45 p.m.
I would throw her next little manipulative  piece of junk letter away without reading it.  These P's are masters of taking shots at us all through their ramblings.  I get this kind of junk from my daughter too.  She is still a minor so I have to read them, but the second she turns 18 I'm done with it. You  sound mentally healthy and on to her game.  Bravo!


-----Original Message-----
From: aplsauce03 <[email protected]>
To: Coping with the Psychopath/Narcissist Child <[email protected]>
Sent: Sun, 2 Nov 2008 5:27 pm
Subject: Letter from NP daughter serving in Iraq

-----------------------------------------------------------

New Message on Coping with the Psychopath/Narcissist Child

-----------------------------------------------------------
From: aplsauce03
Message 1 in Discussion

My NP daughter sent me this from Iraq after a year of no contact after 
assaulting and threatening to kill me in Aug. of 2007.  I added some commentary 
in ( ).  She perfumed this letter, just for an "extra touch".

  I've thought about writing a letter for a while, but honestly, I didn't know 
what to say. Every night the words came so easy, but when I finally sit down I 
go blank.
  I want you to know that I forgive you. (I guess that's for having her arrested 
after the assault).  You may not feel that you have done anything to merit 
forgiveness, but there are some things that I feel differently about.  I forgive 
you for everything, Mom.  And I am deeply sorry if I have ever hurt you in 
anyway.  People do things for many different reasons.  And if in my actions, out 
of feelings of anger or betrayal hurt you-again-I truly am sorry.
  You probably guessed I am in Iraq.  It's going to be alot different this time 
around.  14 hour workdays.  Guarding prisoners.  3 minute showers.  And there is 
a haze of tan that infects everything.  There is no sun.  There is no moon.  Not 
a single piece of green.  Just varying degrees of tan.  (isn't that sad, welcome 
to my world, only you colored it black).  It's almost sad.  And with the work 
schedule, I will probably not be able to finish school.  (Hmmm, no kidding, 
she's 24 she hasn't even started let alone finish, plus she's already given 
herself one more excuse).  I was really looking forward to that.  However 
everything set aside, I am trying to stay positive.  I don't want this place to 
eat me from the inside out like it threatened to do last time.  (Must be 
difficult keeping the mask on that long, but she has no choice tensions are high 
and they're are also armed).  Oh, and I'm hoping to join the "Praise Team" at 
the Chapel.  But, like I said, who knows with the schedule.  (One more excuse).
  John and I are fine.  (her husband she married the day before she had to 
report for training for Iraq.  The 5th time she met him was the wedding day, we 
haven't met him.  She told him I would "eat him alive", however her other 
boyfriends that weren't brainwashed into believing we abused her actually like 
us.  They have never lived together and lived about 1000 mile away with a phone 
courtship).  We talk everyday and still managed to not have a single argument.  
(he's in for a BIG surprise when she returns).  It is difficult, though.  We 
miss each other terribly.  I really wish you could've met him.  (He may have 
learned that she's a liar if that ever happened).  He's everything you could've 
ever wished for me including the whole blonde + blue eye thing.  Right now he's 
working on becoming a Paramedic.  He's already a licensed EMT, but he wants to 
do something a little more.  I'm quite proud of him.  He works his cute little 
butt off.  I'm sure that I could go on and on about him, but all that really 
matters is:  I'm happy.  We bring out the best in each other.  And we take our 
marriage VERY seriously.  (I'm sure).
  I'm sure that I will write again, as I continue to feel some sort of 
obligation to let you know that I'm alright.  (She didn't have that problem 
before she left).  However, I ask that you don't go out of your way to write 
back.  (I have no address).  Simply put, I am not ready for a relationship with 
you.  I am sorry if you felt that being here might change my mind, but it 
hasn't.  (Actually I was just glad she was far away).  I may never be able to 
have a relationship with you, but time changes things.  No one knows the future.
  Please know that regardless of whether or not I see you again (as if she's in 
control of that anymore), I will always love you.  You always have been, and 
always will be my Mother.  (At least she left out the F'ing).  And at some 
point, when I look back to the past, you have been my best friend.  Take care 
and know that I think of you often.
                                                        Love, --------------


I couldn't even begin to make up that crap,  she also put me on the FRG (family 
readiness group) list.  I took myself OFF.  Then the other day she tried to IM 
me.  I denied it.  I want her to stay away.  She must really need "SUPPLY".  I 
have none




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Reply
 Message 3 of 7 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameaplsauce03Sent: 6/11/2008 9:43 p.m.
Thanks Suzanne, I went to the Doc on Monday and got a pill, to help keep my head on straight. Next letter will go from mailbox to fireplace+match.

Reply
 Message 4 of 7 in Discussion 
From: just-meSent: 17/11/2008 9:08 p.m.

Personally…I think you are being a bit too hard and unforgiving. What if she died in Iraq, how would you feel? Believe me, I have gone through very similar issues with my daughter, but I simply cannot completely turn my back on her and wish her dead or non-existent. Perhaps I am wrong.<o:p></o:p>

Anne<o:p></o:p>


Reply
 Message 5 of 7 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameaplsauce03Sent: 21/11/2008 10:06 p.m.
Well, I'm not wishing her dead. But she's threatened to "Kill me", so I'm not feeling a need to put myself in danger any longer. She has also told me "You'd better be careful, cause I've been trained to kill people". And you know what? She has. I'm praying for her safety, that doesn't have anything to do with her coming anywhere near me. Perhaps had she had you by your throat bent backwards over her balcony after punching you in the head and saying those things to you, you might feel differently.

Reply
 Message 6 of 7 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknamefemfreeSent: 23/11/2008 6:19 a.m.
I'm sure aplsauce that I would come to the conclusion that complete and total separation from your daughter who has done these things is the only survival possible.
 
It's a sad tragedy.
 
And, one that could save your life. 

Reply
 Message 7 of 7 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknamesparkysmoonladySent: 23/11/2008 8:40 p.m.
I totally understand Applesauce
 
And I am not too sure about forgiveness and what it means
 
But that letter seems shallow to me - like you only coloured her world "black"
 
My P died - whether I forgave him or not - he died
 
They are manipulative people - I am sure you know her much better than you can ever explain
 
And I bet down deep you still love what she was once 
 
But she has run around and around and disrupted your life and only you know how much
 
Whoever said "burn the next letter"  had it right - but depending on how badly her letters cut you - read it first - you can always off-load it as you have hear
 
Sparky

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