The first one sounded to me, like the mindset (consciousness), which saw beauty (for awhile), but couldn't quite capture it, because of dark clouds and "darkness" in the consciousness.(possibly depression that set in after losing the job)
The hiding "under a table", I'm clueless on that one. A table isn't the best place to hide under, as it's open on all 4 sides.
It sounds like looking for protection, but yet it's inadequate in the long run, but any port in the storm, (so to speak) is better then none at all.