welcome whispert
hmm.
ok. --- first of all, why presage your post with a warning:
here's my first 2 poems to be posted( they suck though)
i don't want to know they suck, at least not right off the bat,
'cause that will prejudice me when i read it.
let the reader judge it's suckiness. or not.
the upper case/lower case is definitely something you'll have
to come to grips with. 'cause it detracts from the read.
and you are not exactly a concrete poet say like Emmett Williams.
so that will have to be re-evaluated by you when writing.
unless it was a typo.
hey - yeah - i know - i haven't even got past the title yet!
ok, so moving on - at a better pace, i hope - this line:
so, you sit in your room listening to the most sadest songs
was that a typo, or did you mean to say 'sadest' as in Sadist?
hey look, i really am not into S&M & i don't care who told you otherwise -
but that would make it an adult poem which is not what this site is about.
check our Group Settings if you don't believe me.
tatto yourself with your pain
see? there it is again - bad spelling & masochism.
and how yo numb it
your wardrobpe change
YO! get yourself a dictionary or spell-checker!
(like the damned Dopler effect here)
i can pick out other nits from your head, but i am sure you
are going to tell me how sensitive you are & so why bother.
see, you should never tell someone in advance that your poetry sucks.
s.
p.s. for the second poem - you win the Hello Kitty! award for the Month of
December. this is something new - Doc/Lucky started it. but since i have the icon
in storage --- i drug her out just for youse!