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| | From:  LynnieSue2 (Original Message) | Sent: 7/6/2005 5:51 PM |
omg arrggggg once again, had my appt with ali.. and talked to her about alot thats been going on.. mostly that im angry, and i dont know how to deal with it, etc, and she says, thats a good thing, it means im getting better, because before i wouldnt acknowledge anger, now i do, but i also beat myself up about it (literally and figuratively) so im like, but what am i supposed to DO??? so she said for me, when i get angry.... (i wont get mad at ppl... etc) well, she said, when i am mad, write it down.. write down why i am mad, what i am feeling etc.. then later on, when im not angry anymore, reread what i wrote, and see if i was justified in my anger, and if so, what i can do .. ..... anyways, all im left with is, yes,ok im angry, but what the hell do i DO with the feelings??? she said, its fine to do what i normally do.. (self injure not eat, whatever, ) as long as i acknowlege that im angry, and then i do it, etc.. but wants me to write it all down.. then look at it later (and show her when i see her) and stuff... she says its a sign that i am getting better, because im angry at my freind who is not, and is in denial etc, but its like, but its complicated, because i so want to be where she is.. its such a fine line..grr anyways, thanks for letting me get this out.. take care, will see you all in chat..suelynn |
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SueL honey I am just not sure what to tell you. I understand that Ali is your therapist, correct? I would not want to second guess her. But......why is it ok for you to do what you have done, such as the self injury, not eat?? Please don't do that because you are angry, please! And that is what you are "angry" not "mad". Angry deals with anger while mad deals with your mind, insane condition! The latter is not you!! Maybe writing down the feelings you are having is a good idea. I know therapist tell you to do that to releave a lot of problems. Anger, depression, horrible dreams or disturbing ones, just a lot of things. I have had to do that myself. Ha have to keep a journal of my seizures too. And you know ones write letters to deceased love ones to finish something they needed to that didn't get done while that person was alive. So yes write it all down. But don't, do not start in with the old things you have done. Promise me please!! I love you and only want what is best for you.  Cylene |
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 AWWWWWWW SUZY, I AM SORRY THAT YOU ARE HAVING ANGER PROBLEMS. I AM SENDING YOU ALL THE BIG HUGS I CAN. I AM HAVING MANY ANGER ISSUES MYSELF RIGHT NOW AND SHOULD DO WHAT YOU DID, GET THEM DOWN HERE IN THE VENTING ROOM, BUT I AM TOO ANGRY TO DO EVEN THAT! I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL AND WISH I COULD MAKE IT ALL BETTER FOR YOU. REMEMBER, FEELINGS ARE ONLY TEMPORARY AND THEY WILL PASS, JUST GIVE IT SOME TIME, GET IT OUT, THEN LET IT GO. SOME ADVICE FROM SOMEONE WHO CAN'T SEEM TO DO IT MYSELF!!! LOL. MUCH LOVE TO YOU MY DEAR FRIEND, DUSTY |
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