Longing To Be Me

A day in a life, one gone astray

Of trying to make it all go away

One pill, two pills, three pills, ten

Will this madness ever end?

Can I find my way out of the dark

Come into the light, without a mark?

Longing to be happy, carefree alive

Instead of heading for a nose dive

Music pumping into my ears

Not really helping to alleviate my fears

Oh so sad and lonely even in a crowd

The world around me is frighteningly loud

Feeling scared, no one to blame but me

Is it as bad as I make it out to be

I feel so lost, in a great big space

Will I ever find my own place?

Putting up walls to block out the world

Weights on my shoulder being unfurled

Pain so intense I feel like I’m dying

But no, I’m alive or at least trying�?/P>

Not sure how I long I can keep up this pace

Everyday putting a fake smile on my face

For down inside me there is a hole

A burning deep within my soul

A yearning for a life that seems so far away

Wondering if I’ll even make it one more day

So I’m reaching out, crying for help

Because I feel as if I can’t do it myself

Will someone hold out their hand

Pull me from out of myself so I can see

That I am ok, and I’m allowed to be me?

Suzy-Lynn Veenboer

June 10^th, 2007