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| | (1 recommendation so far) | Message 1 of 7 in Discussion |
| | From: Katiedid (Original Message) | Sent: 10/26/2005 3:14 PM |
Your heart can be a broken record, never to be played again,
The melody of a lost song, forgotten in time,
Yet, I still hear the tune in my mind,
Can still remember the words...
****
The piano playing those light notes,
And though it was so long ago, I still remember the steps,
I feel you at my side, and we are slowing dancing,
Then it fades, when the rest is gone,
From my mind,
But my heart knows...
****
It knows that it's gone to tell the secret to someone else,
To play the notes so they dance,
And I remain to listen,
I, remain to hum what is not lost, but can only be found. |
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Hi Katie, I enjoyed this sombre yet rather beautiful poem - full of regrets and remembrances woven with the song of love. Emma |
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I love the whistful, almost forlorn feel to this.....works well when read aloud....perhaps a comma or two too many for my tastes but a good read all the same. Well done.
: )lb |
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| | From:  Zydha | Sent: 10/30/2005 12:07 AM |
Hy Katie, your first and last lines really caught me, both have such depth of meaning, but altogether, this is a wonderful piece. I like this concept of the past gone but to be relived again in private. Zy PS. I like the use of puntuation, Katie, I think it helps pace the reading, so don't worry to much about 'him'...he forever has said the same to me, lol |
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Thank you all for finding the time to reply. For me this poem was about someone whose lost, but the past haunts them with a forgotten love song.
Maybe I did put too many commas in, sometimes I can get carried away. lol.
Glad you all enjoyed it.
Katie
~*~ |
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|  0 recommendations | Message 7 of 7 in Discussion |
| | Sent: 10/31/2005 10:23 PM |
| This message has been deleted due to termination of membership. |
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