Stillweeding,

 

   You're under no obligation to abandon hope completely....just don't put all your emotional energy into trying to make him something he's not. Concentrate more on the ' what IS' than the' what IFs'. 

 

It is possible to come to a place of peace and acceptance, rather than resignation.  NO ONE can predict the future. I love my son deeply...just don't  act on those feelings... for my own self preservation.

 

 

I can look at my son now and see him for what he is, and it doesn't tear me up inside. He's just a mixed up human being, not the devil himself. He has a disorder, which tends to manifest itself in malevolent ways. And I cannot allow myself to forget that. Doesn't mean I have to cut him out of my life. I'm not saying NC won't be what's best for you, just that it's not a given for everyone.

 

paradox