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I believe this is an important topic for older woman. Perhaps labeled under one of those things some don't want to talk about but wish they could. This is not my normal topic but if we keep it to a intelligent discussion instead of down right sexual talk it can be allowed on a MATURE board as MSN calls it. This discussion can be for all of us even if you don't have a partner in your life because we all have feelings about it even if you're not getting it. I've read and heard so many things over the years that as women age so does their libido. You either have it or you don't anymore and many reasons can create this. It can be our health, hormonal imbalance, menopause, etc the list goes on. I have heard that some woman actually feel ashamed as they get older thinking its for the young. Whatever the reason most can be over come if there is a desire to get it back. Talk all you want......... |
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| | From: Mia | Sent: 1/7/2008 3:33 AM |
Like TRose, I'm waiting for Jacki's pearls of wisdom. She'll tell it how it is. |
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TRose and Mia...I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on this as well...what if Jacki doesn't come here and give hers? What are your thoughts...since this was put out for everyone to answer? |
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Woman have so many responsibilities and end up having a stressful life. Any emotional issue can effect your sex drive. I know for myself when I am upset over something and can't shake it or feeling depressed my desires are gone. Being upset makes me more tired as well and that certainly doesn't help. I am not like this real often but it does happen and dh is understanding. We have been married for so long that we know each others needs and also don't have the desire now like when we were younger. I myself can't imagine having sex on a daily basis anymore, good lord, no energy for that now. LOL! We seem to be on the same wavelink with the frequency of it and that is what each couple had to decide. There is no right or wrong answer on if you have daily sex or weekly, monthly, whatever it may be. What is normal and acceptable by a couple is what is right. I have a friend who has not had it in over a year with her husband and for them that is OK. They have a very loving relationship but health reasons cause an interference of being able and wanting to for them. It does not effect their relationship and they show their affections in other ways. Thank you Lori for posting here. I hope more take it serious. No one has to discuss their immediate relationship to be able to discuss the issue here. |
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| | From: jacki3 | Sent: 1/7/2008 12:43 PM |
ok ladies, here i go...larry is as useless as tits on a nun..i think he is the 1st frigid man i have ever met...the 1st 2 yrs..if i didn't start sex...we didn't do anything..he was afraid i won't like it, or didn't wanna push himself on me.....it wasn't anything 2 write home about...i was thinking about calling him...minuteman, or quickdraw...then all his surgeries...old saying, dic don't work.. a few yrs. ago i couldn't go w/o it..now i can take it or leave it..and sleepin in seperate bedrooms don't help either ...the damn thing probably dried up, and fell in the toilet w/ a good fart, anyway.... when i was 50, b 4 i met larry, i was running around w/ a married lawyer, we used 2 meet 2 times a week...just for sex, and it lasted over 2 hrs each time...damn what memories... |
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| | From: CC20010 | Sent: 1/7/2008 3:50 PM |
I was about 40 when sex started dropping off.Dh went thru chemo & I played the sympathetic wife.After that,the only time I'd have an orgasim was during a dream.But Dh's constant complaining about EVERYTHING IN LIFE didn't help my mood.A couple of nights ago was the first time we TRIED it in YEARS.Of course we were both stoned at the time.NO GO! |
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| | From: Eve | Sent: 1/7/2008 7:18 PM |
I haven't had sex in over 8 years. Dang! I've had some serious health issues, and hubby has, too. It just doesn't work out for us. We are still affectionate. Many times when I go to visit him at the nursing home we sit and hold hands. That connection means a lot to both of us. Sometimes I think about having sex, but then I remember it takes a LOT of energy and leaves you all sweaty. I'm not sure it's worth it at this point. lol |
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I got you beat! Only mine wasn't caused by health. It was caused by the fact that my ex and I were no longer sleeping together, my choice. I moved out of your bedroom in 1997 and never moved back in. So I've had a 10 year "dry spell" but there are other "alternatives" to sex with men so I'm not missing much. A very good friend of mine sent me a card shortly after I split with my ex that said "Men are good for only ONE thing" and on the inside "But quite often a mechanical device and a pack of batteries does the job better!" |
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Its been quite awhile for me but hubby was very understanding. I was having a terrible time with my periods thruout the past year. Heavy bleeding and every 2 weeks. I finally had a thermal abrasion and it stopped. I'm hoping I am thru the change now. We have had so many things happen over the past year.. that one of us was usually depressed. We are still very close, we have been together since our early teens so just being here for each other is what really matters right now. I take anti depressants which I'm told is suppose to lessen my sex drive, but I'm not sure if thats the case. I'm sure we will have our moments in the future, but right now its not happening. Stress is a big factor and we have alot of that right now. |
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| (1 recommendation so far) | Message 12 of 18 in Discussion |
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LOL Jacki! I think you and I need to swap. I don't want ANY and Hubby won't leave me alone. My antidepressants and other medical and emotional issues killed my sex drive years ago. |
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LOL, LOL, Looneybird...I think I may have met your husband! (Not really!) My EX husband has ruined my desire for sex...he was the same as your husband. CONSTANTLY chasing me around the darn house for 23 years...didn't stop until he moved out of state! GRRRR!!!!! I feel like if I never see that part of a man again it will be too soon! All joking aside, it wasn't a lot of fun to always feel that sort of pressure. I really enjoy the freedom of choice I have now. VIAGRA!!! POOH! Why don't they spend the research money on breast cancer instead of a man's broken....! IMHO! Gena |
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Alilwizernow--I can totally relate to everything you said. |
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I f feal the same way. I know a lot of my friends my age not want sex because there ashamed of there bodies! They are nice women but were pushing sixty and they think they should look 25.The thought of someone seeing them naked and rejecting them or making fun of them is to big a risk for them to take |
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Patti- You're right. Some men and women put a lot of creed on to how one looks and it shouldn't be that way. We are who we are and we shouldn't let anything stop us from what we want. |
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| | From: lindush | Sent: 1/13/2008 2:05 AM |
My sex drive hasn't really changed that much, but my husband has some heath issues that have changed his, as well as his ability to perform some acts.Thank goodness he still his ability to act on his VERY active imagination |
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