Old Tombstone, Arizona by day a tourist attraction, but, by night the old town belongs to the ghost and spirits. Midnight and the streets are dark except for a very dim light coming from the Birdcage Theater. As you draw near the theater you hear faint whispers and a faint sound of music inside. The Birdcage Theater was the place to go during the Earp's Era for drinking, gambling and entertainment. In it's heyday it saw the likes of the Earp brothers, Doc Holiday, Bat Masterson, Wild Bill Hickok, Johnny Ringo, and the Cantons.

Ahhh! Her comes Miss Boni down the board walk to open the theater. She is wearing midnight blue gown trimmed in gold brocade. Her enteurprenurial style should make the place a sucess tonight. she unlocks the doors and as she pushes open the batwing doors, the places isbrightly lit and the sound of a piano playing fills the room. She glides into the room, checks the stock of refreshment and nods to the piano player. The piano player is dressed in a black frock coat and matching pants with a whitle shirt and bolo tie. He has a long flowing mustache and is intent on playing the piano though he is not all that good.

Here comes Eddy! He seems to be our bartender for the night dressed in a cavas white shirt, blue jeans and an apron wrapped around his waist. He goes behind the bar and pulls out the scatter gun and check to see it is loaded. He starts placing a stack of glasses on the bar in anticipation of lively drinking tonight, then polishes the bar with a bar towel. Miss Boni looks on in approval.

Codger enters the theater. He is walking with a giddy up limp( reminds me of Walter Brennan). He goes to the bar and Eddy gives him the scatter gun. Codger looks at Miss bonni and tells her, " Don't you worry Miss Boni! I'm not going to let them get top rambunctious if they do they will be walking funny for a month.". Codger goes to a corner of the room pulls up a chair and sits with the scattergun across his lap.

Muriel enters wearing a mauve satin dress trimed in a dark muave lace and a muave boa feater entwined in her hair. She walks to the roulette table and gives it a spin before going to the bar to get the stacks of chips for the gamblers. She gives Eddy a wink and says, " Don't forget to keep me refreshed running the gambling makes your throat parched. Eddy laughs and winks at her.. Boni speaks, " Muriel make sure you got that derringer in your garter. It is going to be a big night and you never know what will happen." MUriel raises her dress just far enough to show Miss Boni to derringers stowed in her garter. Eddy lets out a big sigh. " Keep your mind on the bar Eddy!, admonishes Miss Boni. Miss Boni Runs a tight ship at The Birdcage.

BAM! The batwings fly open and in comes Lightening Charlie on his horse, Hoofheated. Charlie slides of the horse and straightens up his long rifle frock coat, straightens his shirt, and polishes his sheriff's badge. The horse waks up to the bar and Miss Boni exclaims, " Hoof hearted!". The horse replys, " Charlie did! Give me a beer." Eddy slings a mug of beer down the bar which stops in front of the horse which drinks it down in one gulp. The horse leaves the bar. Charlie sits down at a poker table and Miss Boni walks over to Charlie, removes his stetson puttin it on the table and playfully rubs his head. " What will you have, Charlie?", asks Miss Boni. Charlie replys, " Saspirilla". Eddy brings a sasperilla and puts it on the table, afterall you don't keep Lightening Charlie waiting.

 

The doors swing open and two of the most notorious women in the west walk in. Widomaker Val is dressed inblack jeans, white ruffled shirt, black leather vest, black gambler's hat with a silver buckle band and black slouch boots. The pair of ebony handle Colts on her sides is a warning to all to tred lightly in her presence. Krazy Katrina is dressedn in fawn colored jeans, brown and tan poncho, brown steson with gold band, and buckskin knee high boots. What makes her so crazy is the arsenal she hides under the poncho, you never know what will come out. Theystroll to the bar. Val orders a vodka with a scorpion while Katrina orders a white wine and raspberries. Eddy mixes the drinks quickly and sets them down. Miss Boni strolls over, " What brings you here?" Val looks at her , "We heard this is where the action is. Miss Boni replies, " You definitely came to the right place."

A figure in the dark walks through the doors into the light. It is Cimmaron Banister standing there in his buckskins with his holstered big Walker Colts on each side and his dusty tan stetson with two crow feathers in it. He looks at Katrina and val and speaks, " Shouldn't you women be home tending to the menfolk, cooking and such?". Val starts to reach for her side arms, but, Katrina lays a hand on her arm saying, "This one is mine. I've dealt with the likes of him before.". Cimmaron and Katrina square off ready to draw. " Draw!" someone yells. Before cimmaron can clear leather, Katrina drills to pies into his head. Cimmaron falls to the floor mortally merangued. The sherriff calls to his horse, Hoofhearted, and draped Cimmeron's still form over the saddle. Charlie starts out the door to head for Boot Hill when Miss Boni says, " Hurry Charlie, fresh doughnuts are coming off the stove now." Cimmeron jumps off the horse and tells, Charlie, " We are going to have to wait until tomorrow, "I'm not going to miss free doughnuts". Charlie sends Hoofhearted back out into the night while Cimmeron runs to the bar to get a plate of doughnuts. Eddy hollers, " Hey! no slobbering on my bar."

 

A thunder of hooves breaks the tension and a stage coach pulls up in front of the Birdcage. The driver jumps down and comes in. " Hi, Andy!" exclaims Miss Boni. Andy says, "Miss Boni, I got a whle coach load. Everyone wanted to come tonight." Andy shakes and a cloud of dust flies from his Canvas coat, cambray shirt, denim jeans, bandana, and wide brim hat. Andy hold the door open and in walks Diamond Lil, Clamimty Jane, Lily Roundtree, Judge Roy Bean, Wild Bill Hickok, Billy the Kid, and Pat Garrett. They all circled the room and and found their tables. Andy goes to the bar and gets a much needed drink. Murielmspins the roulette wheel since the Judge is feeling like a high roller tonight.

Dry Gulch Red stumbles into the room. He goes to the bar and roars, " Give me the Girl." Eddy slides one down the bar to him. He drinks it down and then notices the piano player. "Stop playing, you are lousy.", Red yells. The piano player just keeps on playing. Red pulls his sixshooter and shoots a key off the piano. The piano player unfazed, keeps playing. " Stop!", Red yells. Red shoots another key off the piano. The piano player keeps playing. Red draws a bead and shoots a leg off the stool under the piano player. He keeps playing. Charlie gets up and walks over to Red. " Better give me your gun before you get pumped full of lead.", speaks Charlie. Red looks at him incredulously and says, " You mean the people in here are going to shoot me over that lousy piano player?". Charlie replies, " No, but, when Wyatt Earp finishes playing, he probally will." Red throws his gun on the bar and finds a seat in the furtherest corner of the room. Miss Boni who was looking on just smiles. Codger grudginly lays the scatter gun back on his lap. Val twirls her pistol and rests it back in her holster. Katrina eases a sweet potato pie back under her poncho. " Time for some entertainment. Straight from St. Louis, She chirps like a nightengale doing her new dances from the East, Tweety!" proclaims Miss Boni to room. On stage comes Tweety dressed in a yellow satin gown and golden slippers. Wyat starts playing, then a voice like none other starts singing , " Oh those golden slipper, Oh those golden slippers". Tweety dances and sings throwing up her dress and petticoats and the men go wild. Judge Bean throws poker chips on the stage, Billy the Kid shoots into the ceiling, Pat Garrett sends Champagne to the stage, and the rest of the men jump nout of their chairs whooping and dancing.

 

Tweety finishes he song and dance and Sheriff Charlie helps her off the stage and dances her across the room, Clamity Jane grabs Cimmeron and leads him in a dance and they did well considering they stepped on each others feet. A pair of arms come out the bar mirror and grab Eddy. Eddy pulls back and out pops Cutnose Kate and they dance behind the bar. Judge bean grabs Muriel and around they go. Red slips up behind Katrina and they twirl around the floor whil;e with one hand Red tries to disarm her of her sweet potato pie. Andy trips the light fantastic with Miss Boni. Even Codger had to lay down his scatter gun when Val pulled him on to the floor. Meanwhile a preacher walks in. Miss Boni amazed asked, 'Preacher what are you doing here?" The preacher replied, "I'm just spreading the seed of Good." Billy the Kid yells, " You spread them and I'll plant them." A man dressed in a gray frock coat and pants, gray gambler's hat, and siver and black patterned silk vest. He is wearing a cross draw holster with a 1860 Colt. He looks around the room and heads to the bar. Wyatt hollers, " Gray, I wondered when you would show up. I got to go down the street a minute." Wyatt leaves and Pat Garrett plays the piano. Gray moves toward the bar when he and Val collide. They put their hands on their guns and their eyes lock. Val finally breaks the silence., " I don't need a gun to handle you. We can duke it out in the back room." They both took off their holsters laying them on the bar. " Whoa! There will be no fighting in my bar. Take it out to the corral." said Miss Boni stearnly. Codger had grab the scatter gun and helf on Val and Gray. Codger, put the gun away!, said Miss Boni. Codger jumped up and down, " Dag nab it! You wan me to stop the fighting and when i have a chance to do it, you won't let me. One day you'll want me to do and I won't. I just as well be in the back room sleeping. Maybe I will. Get me a drink and just go to that backroom. Don't call me if someone breaks up the bar!". Boni replied, Ok Codger just get yourself a beer and calm down. No one wants you to sleep in the backroom , you snore too loud." Gray and Val leave the saloon pushing each other out the door.

 

As the two leave a man in a black with a derby hat and cane walks in. Cimmeron yells, I will be a son of a crow, if it isn't Dax Masterson. Dax walks to the bar 'but, doesn't make it Diamond Lil grabs him and they go swinging around to room. In walks Paul Steeler. Known as a gambl;er with a fast temper and a faster gun. He strides to the bar and orders a whiskey. " I'm the fastest gun that ever was!", he proclaims. "Oh Brother, I have heard that before.", exclaims Krazy Katrina. You could see the blood drain from Paul's face. Cimmeron was sitting at the table laughing. Miss Boni strolls over and looks Paul in the eyes, "You maybe the fastest for sure, but, not the best." and walks off with a big smile on her face.

Dax finished the dance with Diamond Lil and ordered a burbon from the bar. Charlie and Tweety were still dancing trading partners often with Red and Clamity Jane. Steeler grabbed Miss Boni and danced as Pat played Blaze of Glory on the piano.

 

Meanwhile, Val and Gray squared off at the OK Corral when all of a sudden they were surrounded. The Clantons behind them and the Earps in front. Guns started blazing and Val was ducking and weaving until a strong hand pulled her into the stable. Doc Holiday had pulled her into the barn leaving Gray with his shotgun shooting it out with the Clantons. Doc pulled Val to him and said, " We should get down to business, you're a daisy if you don't." Val looked into his face and realized he looked exactly like Val Kilmer and said , " I'll be your huckleberry."