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I choose to speak about the bad moments in my life. This is what I feel I need to do in order to release them and move on. I hope that by saying this it may some day help another. My childhood was not the best, at the tender age of 7 my life took a downward spiral. A spiral that I am still trying to get up from. I was "groomed" at the age of 7 by someone who should have known better. I was touched "incidently" as they say but it was deliberate. First, it was just gentle brushing as the person went past. Eventually, the brushing turned to rubbing mainly along the leg. It progressed gradually. Until one day the unthinkable happened. I was made to perform oral sex on this person. He told me it was a gift. A precious gift of love. At this time I felt that God had forsaken me. Cast me away. I lost all faith as my innocence left my life. The child was gone. The child was abandoned. The child had died. Leaving me with an empty shell. I am so lost. |
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| 0 recommendations | Message 6 of 17 in Discussion |
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crystal. It took alot of courage to talk about what happened to you. i had a similar experience when i was just three but never spoke about it. i let it ruin my life for a long time but finally am able to move on now. im now puttin my horrible experience to good use and training to be a psychologist who will help children who have had to deal with similar issues.What doen't kill you makes you stronger crystal and you are obviously a very strong person. be proud of yourself and remember its in the past and cant hurt you anymore Pretty Irish Kitty (L) (F) |
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| | From: jacci | Sent: 3/23/2005 2:14 PM |
hi i too have had similar, i know it is hard but i got through it and all the other crap ive had as a child by having a "circle of influence". there are only 5 people in my circle, my three children, my partner and my best freind of 24 years. these people would never deliberately hurt me, i only totally care properly for these 5. The others who are on the outside of my circle dont have a single right to influence my thoughts or make me feel anything, i no longer feel guilty if i dont want to see my mum or others or answer her call etc. i do forgive some of them as they dont know better yet but i choose what and if i see them. i decided that all the crap in my old life ruined that time of my life ...i wrote it all down even sent a few letters to these people....when i put it in the letter box that was the end.....i would not let then ruin the whole of my life....they are not in my circle therefore any thought to these people is giving them power in my being ...and they had certainly taken enough !!!! so spring is coming...it is worth a try climb up and out of that spiral...shove out that thought process. do an " up yours, you wrecked 20 years ...you are not going to wreck the next !!!! " i know it is hard. but you have 2 choices, i guess that one day you may wake up and think ive had enough of feeling this way. good luck in your journey its tough but its the best thing i ever ever did. god bless and good luck jacci x |
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You'll get thire I have been thire also alot of us have you have taken the first step Just by speaking out Now the healing begins if you ever need to talk scream or just need a shoulder to lean on I am hear Love and Blessings Kitten (Carol ) |
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Bless you Keep up the great work |
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Hi Jacci Bless you hun, may your world be a much better place for the future love BlueBell xx |
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i have also been through a similar thing too,at a young age like urself,and i let it get to me for so long that i started drinking very heavily,but i know now that it wasent my fault and have got through it and stoped drinking and have now became a better and stronger person,i know u can never forget somethink like that but in time darling u will find away of coping and just taking it one day at the time,dont let this mean person control ur life anymore! god bless u hunny shelly x x x x |
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Aww hun as someone else has already said you have taken the first step by writing it down and getting it off your chest ((((((hugs))))) to you hun you are a very strong and brave lady. We are all there for you, I wont say I can understand what your going through cos I have not been there but can empathise and am there if you ever want a chat hun love and more ((((((((HUGS)))) Nutty xxxxxx |
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I have been there, and I have not let it ruined me. In fact I even forgave the person williingly. Congrats for getting it off your chest. God does not abandon you, and you are never to blame!! What others have said is true, the past cannot hurt you....only if you let it. But dont worry, cuz it is gone. Big hugs.... |
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My love and blessings to you crystal I will include you in my prayers and on my healing list. God bless you Love, Songbird xx |
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