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| | From: mrharley (Original Message) | Sent: 10/12/2005 10:35 PM |
hi, I have joined this group for a lot of reasons, but mainly because i am at the end of my ropes. I am 44 and 5 years ago I was one of them, yea them, normal people that cant understand because they cant see inside me or feel what i feel each and every moment that i am awake. I had a fusion in L4,L5 and spondleothies how ever thats spelled. anyway in june of this last year i went through my second surgury, I have lost most of my friends, my girl friend, my kids are sick over my health. and i am on enough medication to stop a rhino dead in its tracks. I learned like alot have not to tell people what you take, because the people that know think i am now just addicted and a druggie.... I am alone in this thought but dont you just want some people to feel what you feel just for a day, so they have some understanding? I hate that i look normal, therefore i must be right? I cant get out of bed much, i am severly depressed.... and i miss human contact so much. I am seeing a counciler and continue to see a dr, but insurance is running out soon, and then i am not sure what i am going to do. anyway i am sure i will be very active on this board, i have went though so much, and need an outlet. i wanted to join a group meetings with people but that would mean driving. so here i am.... god i hope i dont drive all of you out too. |
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| | From: Dan | Sent: 10/12/2005 11:54 PM |
Welcome to the family, Mr. Harley. I doubt you'll drive us away. We really only have one rule here, and that's to treat everyone like you would like to be treated. Oh, and keep politics over on the poliitcal board. <Grin> It's not uncommon for there to be turnover in friends when we get chronic pain. People see us and they get uncomfortable. They don't want to think how close they are to being just like us, so they make themselves scarce. It's sad but true. Over there on the left is a lot of infirmation on Chronic pain. If you have any questions let us know. OK? Dan |
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Welcome to our Home! You will find so much compassion here, you will have so many friends who truley care.. I know what you mean when you say friends are uncomfortable, Do I ever..I really think there afraid it will happen to them, so therefore they stay away...we know it doesn't work that way but tell them that! Our meds? Scare the hell out of them or they wish they could have them to...whichever there crazy, no one should want for this. Our Pain is so incredible at times I too stay in bed, is it good? I don't know but it seems I am in bed more than I am out...so I now have to go to a counselor, great huh? Just what I need to do? Sit and tell her about my pain so she can try to feel it? I don't want to go but I have no choice about it, my case manager is sending me! She said I am depressed? How would she know this? I don't know! I had surgery, lamectomy, fusion front and back... on my neck from c3 down to c6, I tipped at C2, now I am facing more surgery where there taking all the comtraptions out of me and putting a rod in from c2 to probabaly t5, I think they should go down futher but what do I know? The surgeon told me he really doesn't want to go higher because it would lock my neck...OMG!...tipping only happens to the 1% group which is me...OMG! Figures! What's stopping my surgery? An Infection... So I am in so much pain I can't take it any more. Insurance ran out to for my meds, so my pain Doc just gave me new scripts for cheaper drugs so I can afford them... Well wishing you well you came to the right place but so sorry to see you here... God Bless You, Love, Shelley |
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