Vanishing ady,
Please change your name, LOL, after what you said about trying to commit suicide!
Ok now to the narcotics...
I ask myself the same ??'s about my pain Doc, every month, he says "ya know people are talking"! "Theres going to be a point where there are no alternatives to your pain, there isn't much more I can give you"... God knows how good he is to me...and he knows how much pain I am in, so he really gives me some heavy meds.
I look at him because if I didn't have my pain meds I would be in your situation as well, To much pain to handle...even on them it's way to much pain for me...But we somehow learn to handle it.
My situation is going to be permanent pain! Not that I want it or the Docs do it is the way it is with me, my story goes "this surgey isn't to make you better it is to stop the progression"...I am so tired of hearing it you don't know! I hear this from every Doc I go to, it makes me cry and I can't take the pain either anymore but what do we do? Ask for more pain meds, our state has that data base to, I make sure my Pain Doc has all the documentation he needs so he doesn't get in any trouble...OMG what would I do...
I am on some pretty tough narcotics these days and there not working at all for me, plus I ran out of money for the year for my meds thru my insurance company so now I have to pay for them myself...another OMG! So, this Wednesday I go to him for my appointment and have to say to him PLEASE change my Meds to a cheaper DRUGS! Please! I can't afford the ones I am on...I know he is going to look at me and say, " When is your surgery scheduled" ? I have to say not yet...because of other health reasons..they won't operate on me yet because of infection...so I sit in pain and agony....the thing is it will not stop my pain either...so I will be on them the rest of my life.
I really think the trick is to keep your Pain Doc informed by either having your Medical Doc, Surgeon, tests, whatever, informed so there is no problem with the state...therefore there is no problem I mean what is anyone to say when you have documented tests results stating your in so much agony you could not live without narcotics...Let me see them try...
I had to go off my narcotics for one month, it was the worse month of my life, I didn't think I would make it, I think it was so unfair of this Infectious Disease Doctor! I could have died! Talk about pain! Plus the pain your in from not having them!
Geezus I take kadian in 2 strengths, dilaudin, soma, elavil, he wanted to see if it was the meds causing my infection! After the month he said well I guess it wasn't from that! OMG I wanted to push him away and storm out the door...
God Bless, Love, Shelley