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| | | From: bunny (Original Message) | Sent: 10/23/2002 9:55 PM |
I just dont understand it... I have had this quaker since about June of '02. he was kind of a rescue. my neighbor was neglecting him really bad. He has no toe nails at all so he cant get the feathers preened on the back of his head. If Some one came by the cage he would attack the bars and wouldnt let any one near him. I thought at first he was very very cage protected ( plus the macaw and cockatoo that used to break into his cage and attack him, and the two large dogs that were around all the time) My neighbor just wasnt accomodating him the way he sould have been ( abviously he didnt want the bird that much to just give it up) . anyway I brought him home and started preening him and he cuddled with me and was nice... he was nice to every body else too. Then a couple days after he started nipping me and not leting near his cage again. but he will let my husband in his cage and cuddle with him. help me!!!! |
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I can only talk used birds in general--not quaker specific as I have none--but used birds take TIME. He may have some bad memories of a woman --or he just may have picked your husband to be his favorite. Whatever he does--and you don't say how old he is--it took awhile for him to get that way--and it will take awhile to go the other direction. You can NEVER have the same expectations with a used bird that you see with people and young birds they have had since weaning.Thats not to say you won't have that relationship--just don't expect it! But you can build trust and friendship over--time. A lot of how things go are up to the bird and you really have to listen to him. If he wants to be cuddled --fine--if not let him know thats okay too. If he wants to stay in his cage--let him--but give him options. When you do have him out take him out of site of the cage--and try to work with him some when husband isn't home. Katz |
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| | From:  Naynay® | Sent: 10/24/2002 12:33 PM |
And NEVER take it personally! He has more going on in there, little baggage that YOU didn't pack. Give him some time and don't let hurt feelings show. Most of the time with "older" birds, we need to be happy and content with the fact that they are being taken care of and safe. That's usually why we move them, not to hug and hold them. I have a couple that I CATER to like little kings and queens. They have the biggest and best that I can give because they deserve it. They don't want loving and petting! One bites every chance he gets. BUT...why did I bring them home?? For them and their wellbeing, not my feelings and ego. Maybe I look at it wrong?? I think it's expectations and our hurt feelings that cause many of our problems. I did everything but backflips here a FEW times and felt AWEFUL that they still didn't "Like" me. Do the best that you can to provide for all his needs, give him time to adjust. Work with him like Katz said but always remember why you brought him home and let that be enough. Nay |
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There's great advice here. One thing I did with my "mean little quaker" was to work with him in another room, which you might want to try. I find quakers over territorial around their cages. Mine wouldn't let me take him out of his cage at all and would attack the sides of his cage when anyone was standing too close to it. But once he was outside of the cage - it was another story. And once he was in the kitchen or bedroom, - WOW - what a different little bird! So - I began working with him a couple of times a day "elsewhere". Now that he does trust me - and it took weeks of work - he will step-up for me, even from inside his cage. He no longer screams or attacks the sides of his cage when I'm there, but still has these behaviors with everyone else. TRUST is the key - with all birds, but with quakers especially. |
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| | | From: bunny | Sent: 10/24/2002 3:29 PM |
thank you all for your advice. its just so frusterating. hes 3 yrs old well thats what my neighbor said anyway. he also said he was born with no nails. its not even that my husband takes care of him. I'm the one that feeds him and waters him and cleans his cage and gives him his favorite treats. I just dont understand it. well thank you all very much. |
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Bunny, Have you asked your husband to take your bird to another room, leave, and then you go in? I don't have a quaker, but this has worked for many people whose birds are cage protective. Sometimes when the bird is not in sight of his cage, he will be nicer to people in the family. My Diana eclectus has become cage protective. I don't dare even touch her cage or she strikes at me. This started when she became sexually mature and continues even when the hormones are not surging. I can open the cage door and tell her to step up without getting bitten. Once she is completely away from the cage, I rarely get bitten. She was handfed by me from 11 weeks old and still became a crabby girl at maturity. Another thing that I have noticed with a couple of my mature birds--I don't give them time to think about whether they will step up or not. I expect them to step up on command so I walk up, put my hand up, right against their belly, say step up, or "come on" and they almost always do without hesitation. If I go to them and hesitate long enough to give them time to think about it, I sometimes will get that bite. Your bird may not know the step up command well enough for you to get away with this, but for birds who have been trained, it usually works--at least with mine it does. I don't always say step-up. They seem to know when I want them to, maybe because of the way I hold my hand. And I smile and talk to them as I approach them. Your bird probably doesn't hate you. He's frightened of something. Do you move faster than your hubby? Do you make rapid movements with your hands? Do you talk loudly? A soft soothing voice can help to calm frightened birds. Many people on BB have calmed frightened birds by sitting near the cage, reading to the birds in a soft voice. It can take a while but is worth the time. Our fear of being bitten is quite noticeable to the birds, I think. If we are afraid and hesitant, they seem to know they have the upper hand. Gee, I have written a book.  I just hope some of this helps you. Annie |
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| | | From: bunny | Sent: 10/24/2002 5:32 PM |
unfourtunetlly annie that doent really help at all. I have been doing that all of that since he started being like this. I've done this with all of my animals. I have had a few diferent animals with this problem. I tend to take the animals that nobody wants, weather they are mean or old or hurt. I have a rat the is about just on his last leg. A physco Rabbit that is getting alot better with me doing these things. I just got a new bird 2 weeks ago that is making alot of progress(he was very neglected and wasnt eating) I dont have a single animal in my house that I didnt take out of some bad situation( well except for my trantula) I have been bitten by so many animals that I am no longer afraid of a simple bite from a quaker. I sit by his cage every daywhen I'm eating and give him little bits of my food. My husband takes him out and normally goes to watch tv in another room with him. I can only pet him if my husband is in sight instead of me. I try opening the cage and coaxing him out with a cracker or something. he will take the snack and run or fly if I get to close. I've been trying to get a hold of him to clip his wings. last time I tried he bit me right between my thumb and first finger you know that pressure point there I couldnt move my hand for 2 hours. luckily he has never drawn blood. some one told me that quakers almost always choose one person to bond to and dont like any one else!?!? has any one else had this problem??? Another person said the it seems that quakers warm up to male more than females???? |
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you know, Quakers are also very tempermental, territorial birds. I have one and got her when she was 3 months. We bonded and I am the only one in our house that can do for her. She even chased my sister that came to live with us for awhile. She would come down off her cage and actually chase her. My grown daughter cannot go near her cage either. She doesn't care for the men in our house but she's not as aggressive towards them as she is to Sarah and Mary. Maybe its jealousy. I don't know but they stay clear of her. She sneaked up on Mary one time and attacked her. But I wouldn't take anything for her. She's my PauliePoo! ParrotGirl3 ----- Original Message ----- From: Bird Brainz Sent: Thursday, October 24, 2002 4:35 AM To: Bird Brainz Subject: Re: help! my quaker hates me!! <STYLE type=text/css> /* Foreground colors */ .ThmFgColumnHeader, A.FrameLink, A.HeaderLink, A.FooterLink, A.LgtCmd, A.MSNLink {color:#FFFFFF;} .ThmFgTitleLightBk {color:#FF6600;} .ThmFgNavLink, A.NavLink, A.ChildLink:hover {color:#666699;} .ThmFgInactiveText, A.SystemLink {color: #666666;} .ThmFgFrameTitle {color: #FFFFCC;} .ThmFgTitleDarkBk, A.NavLink:hover, A.TitleLink {color: #CC6600;} .ThmFgMiscText, A.Cat, A.SubCat {color: #336699;} .ThmFgCommand, A.Command, A.LargeCommand, A.MsgLink {color: #003366;} .ThmFgHeader {color: #333333;} .ThmFgStandard, A.SystemLink:hover, A.SubLink, A.ChildLink, A.StdLink, SELECT.Standard {color: #000000;} .ThmFgDivider {color: #CCCCCC;} /* primarily for HR tags */ /* Background colors */ .ThmBgStandard {background-color: #FFFFFF;} .ThmBgUnknown1 {background-color: #FF6600;} .ThmBgFraming {background-color: #666699;} .ThmBgUnknown2 {background-color: #666666; display:none} .ThmBgHighlightDark {background-color: #FFFFCC;} .ThmBgHighlightLight, #idToolbar {background-color: #FFFFE8;} .ThmBgTitleDarkBk {background-color: #F1F1F1; display:none}} .ThmBgAlternate {background-color: #ECF1F6;} .ThmBgUnknown3 {background-color: #CCCCFF;} .ThmBgDivider {background-color: #CCCCCC;} .ThmBgHeader {background-color: #9999CC;} .ThmBgLinks {background-color: #8696C9;} .ThmBgSharkBar {background-color: #8696C9;} </STYLE>
help! my quaker hates me!!
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| | | From: Naynay |
And NEVER take it personally! He has more going on in there, little baggage that YOU didn't pack. Give him some time and don't let hurt feelings show. Most of the time with "older" birds, we need to be happy and content with the fact that they are being taken care of and safe. That's usually why we move them, not to hug and hold them. I have a couple that I CATER to like little kings and queens. They have the biggest and best that I can give because they deserve it. They don't want loving and petting! One bites every chance he gets. BUT...why did I bring them home?? For them and their wellbeing, not my feelings and ego. Maybe I look at it wrong?? I think it's expectations and our hurt feelings that cause many of our problems. I did everything but backflips here a FEW times and felt AWEFUL that they still didn't "Like" me. Do the best that you can to provide for all his needs, give him time to adjust. Work with him like Katz said but always remember why you brought him home and let that be enough. Nay | |
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Hi! Kyra came to us as a supposed "handfed" baby, but she was as wild as could be. My husband spent months taming her & handling her & he even taught her to say her first word. Then I started handling her too & she decided she hates everyone except me. Go figure :/ Right now I've been trying to get her used to other people since she screams & tries to bite at the first sign of a stranger. I wouldn't take it personally, we never know what goes on in the minds of these babies(not for sure). Azarae D. |
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Hi Bunny! I happen to have three quakers, all of which are extrememly different personality wise. Pippin, our green quaker that we got when he was still weaning, bonded equally with my mom and myself since we were both such a major part of his life when he was little. Our new little Baby Blue, however, who is 3 and was bought "used" has bonded only to me. I think every bird has the potential to be a one person bird or a multiple person bird given the right opportunities when they're young, but a "used" bird, I've found, will come with the tendancy to be one or the other. Not to say you couldn't change that eventually. Check out Guide to a Well Behaved Parrot, and Guide to the Quaker Parrot, both by Mattie Sue Athan. I found both to be fascinating and very helpful concerning treating problem behaviors. Hope my experiences can help! Always, Silverbutterfly |
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| | | From: Ollie· | Sent: 1/13/2003 12:00 AM |
Try just sitting quietly by his cage and every now and then talk to him.....This bird has learned that people cannot be trusted, he may go to your hubby because thats the only thing he knows and it is his comfort zone. Dont offer treats....yet, he may interpret that as a hostile move on your part, he needs to know that you are not going to hurt him, and sitting quietly will help give him time just to adjust to you and your movements and voice, do some quiet activity like reading, this problem will not change overnight, and try not to get too excited over every small step he makes towards you, because it could send him back to starting point... and if that does happen , dont feel bad, just back up tothe steps that he feels comfortable with and go from there Birds are flock animals and they DO want to be part of the flock, but you have to earn his trust first. Ollie |
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Bunny, We just recently purchase a Quaker that is about a year old. It did the same thing. It was my bird for the first couple of days and then he wouldn't let anyone near his cage. My husband read a book on Quakers that we got at the shop were we purchased the bird. It recommended lowering his cage, re-arranging it every couple of days. That will take some of the biting away, they associate height with power, we even lowered the perch inside the cage. Try to make eye contact with the bird and talk to it. Also, another thing, get a perch that you do not leave in the cage....stick that in and ask the bird to step up, this way you don't get bit. But for sure it said to work with the bird with the cage not in sight. My husband is still his favorite, he will lay on his chest and let my husband rub the back of his neck for hours.....he still comes to me but my husband just has a way with animals. They love him. |
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Bunny, I have had two quakers. Mickey and Buddie. It takes a long time after they have been mistreated to trust you. They do seem to bond to one person. I have tried the thing of getting them lower than eye level . I do this with all my birds if they are acting up. It just may take a long time for your little quaker to trust you. It was so... bad for the previous owner to allow the other birds to mis treat the little Quaker like that. They are a joy when they trust you. Buddie talks and can say anything. They have great personalities. Hope everything works out for you. Frances |
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