TOP 8 MORONS OF 2008.....

 

1.. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?

AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months,

saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26

million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter

who's lacking intelligence.

 

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS.

Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue

a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After

firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the

man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting ,

' Please come out and give yourself up.'

 

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???

An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a

motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated

teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw

money from his own bank accounts.

 

4. THE GETAWAY!

A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for

all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was

too small , so he tied up the store clerk and worked the

counter himself for three hours until police showed up and

grabbed him..

 

5. DID I SAY THAT???

Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect

who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When

detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words:

'Give me all your money or I 'll shoot', the man

shouted, 'that's not what I said!'

 

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING???

A man spoke frantically into the phone: 'My wife is

pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes

apart'. 'Is this her first child?' the doctor

asked. 'No!' the man shouted, 'This is her

husband!'

 

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!

In Modesto , CA , Steven Richard King was arrested for

trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon..

King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun.

Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.

(hellooooooo)!

 

8. THE GRAND FINALE!!!

Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high

desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to

boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they

tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat,

going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no

matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of

trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina,

thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was

wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in

perfect working condition The engine ran fine, the out-drive

went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and

pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to

check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was

laughing so hard.

NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE..

Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the

trailer!