Hi Golflady.
I'm so sorry for your situation. The mentally/personality disordered just love to cause a rift between two people. That way, the real problem is hidden under layers of accusations and the real problem (the bully) is projected outwards as they accuse other people of being the problem, not looking at their own behaviour. Just learning this is a huge step forward.
Please know also, that in my nearly 10 years of managing such forums that I've been very surprised to find such high numbers of mentally affected people who have hooked up with others with mental problems. They partner with each other in hugh numbers. They are drawn to their own kind it seems and we find about (give or take) 40% of our members fall into this category according to experienced forum managers.
I recommend getting coping tips from your local mentalhealth association and, do learn quickly, how to say no to actual questions and to detach from their histrionic behaviour. Sadly, there is no cure and if you've been reading at our forum, it is sad to see the numbers of adoptive children.
Take Care - be strong.
femfree
A favourite tactic of the bully in the family is to set people against each other. The benefits to the bully are that: a) the bully gains a great deal of gratification (a perverse form of satisfaction) from encouraging and provoking argument, quarrelling and hostility, and then from watching others engage in adversarial interaction and destructive conflict, and b) the ensuing conflict ensures that people's attention is distracted and diverted away from the cause of the conflict
http://groups.msn.com/narcissisticpersonalitydisorder/thebully.msnw 
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