Backstage we see Dante in a semi darkened area of the arena. He’s got the Impact title draped over his shoulder and he looks like he’s ready for war. Anarchy war to be exact.

“The only thing that we can affect is right now. This moment we stand in now. That is where I concern myself. The ghosts of the past are just that, ghosts, dead and buried�?/FONT>

 Wo wo wo! We're ringside for Johnny Legend's match against Cross. All the fans in the joint are buzzing like they're wasps in a bee's hive. Wasps always ruin the party, stupid wasps. Kewl is getting ripped on by Kenni, and some of the fans sitting next to them are pointing and laughing at Kewl. Poor Kewl.

"Due to the graphic nature of this program... listener discretion... is advised."

The infamous words of the opening to Edgecrusher by Fear Factory rips through the speakers followed by the opening chords of the song. The crowd comes to their feet with a huge ovation as Cross steps out through the curtains and onto the stage donning a sleeveless "Straight Shootin' Hardcore Canuck" shirt. He stands there momentarily looking out at the crowd before making his way down the steps and into the aisle heading for the ring. He slides into the ring, and stands up.

Binkle: "The following match is a San Antonio street fight bout. There really is no introduction needed, this man is CROSS! If you don't know him... now you do, and what rock were you under?"

Cross isn't paying attention as Johnny Legend pops out from the crowd with a chair, and hops up onto the top rope. The fans start yelling, but's too late! Legend launches himself off the top rope, and NAILS Cross with a huge chair shot! Cross falls to a knee, and looks up at Johnny who slams the chair stiffly across his back once again. This time Cross falls to the mat, and rolls out of the ring. He holds his back in pain, and suddenly he finds Johnny frickin' Legend diving through the ropes, and knocking him into the announcer's table.

Kewl: "Whoa, Johnny Legend is surprisingly in control here in the beginning."

Kenni: "What did you expect? That big giant oaf to have the lightning quick and extremely brilliant Johnny Legend under his thumb? I don't think so!"

Legend: "Thanks, Trunks."

Cross: "I'LL KILL YOU TRUNKS!"

Kenni: "Yipe!"

Johnny Legend still somehow gets the upper-hand on Cross, and slams his face against the announcer's table. Legend drags Cross over to the barricade, and slams him up against it, which causes it to topple over. Legend picks Cross back up, and attempts a suplex, but Cross powers out of it. Legend is left out of position, and Cross just shoves him into the apron, causing Legend's back to hit the edge of the mat hard. While Legend copes with the pain, Cross is up to no good! Cross rips the barricade up off the ground, completely breaking the couplings that connect the steel barricade to the other barricades. He turns around, and runs right at Legend. Legend's eyes get real big, and somehow... in some crazy Twilight zone way, Cross hits nothing but ropes. Cross stumbles back, turns, and walks right into a dropkick from Legend. The kick sending the barricade right into Cross' face. Cross stumbles back, and looks like he's seeing stars. Legend walks up, and right before he gets to Cross, Cross whips the barricade right into his face. Legend hits the floor, and covers his face.

Kenni: "That's blasphemy! Destroying a face like that!"

Kewl: "You like Legend's face?"

Cross picks Johnny up, and lifts him up into the air military press style. He tells the crowd to move out of the way, and of course they move. When Cross says jump, they say 'How High was a great fuckin' movie, Cross!', and jump. As soon as the fans clear out, Cross dashes towards the empty chairs, and looks as if he's going to throw Johnny into them, but somehow Johnny slips out of Cross' grasp! Cross runs forward a bit, and turns around to see a chair flying right at his face. He punches it out of the way, and walks towards Johnny who picks up more chairs and throws them at him. Cross slaps them away like the terminator, until he grabs one, is close enough to Johnny, and hits Johnny over the head so hard it leaves an indent the shape of Legend's head on the seat. Legend crumbles to the floor as the fans go spastic! Cross picks Legend up, turns the chair around so that the indent is facing out, and slams the chair across his head once again. Now the chair is back straight somewhat, and Legend begins to don the crimson mask.

Kenni: "UNBELIEVABLE! A face of solid gold just started gushing blood!"

Kewl: "You do! You really like Legend's face, what else do you like about him? The smell of his hair? His spunky in-your-face attitude? Oh, he's not spunky, and he's usually meddling behind people's backs. I must be thinking of someone else."

Kenni: "Like your mom."

Kewl: "Yeah, well at least I don't say 'YIPES' when I crap my pants."

Kenni: "No, you just say 'MOMMIE, GET OFF OF TRUNKS AND COME CHANGE MY DIAPER!' Loser."

Cross goes to pick Legend up, but Legend hits a low blow on Cross. Cross doubles over, and Legend just keeps low blowing him. Soon enough the fans are throwing trash at Legend who gets to his feet, looks at Cross, and makes a break for it backstage. We follow after Johnny who is zipping down the corridors, he turns one corridor, and bumps right into the Jerm.

The Jerm: "What the Hell are you doing back here? Don't you have a match?"

Legend points behind him, and explains himself in between pants.

Legend: "Big guy... *pants* gonna... *pants* kill me... *pants*... or worse *pants*... cut my hair!"

The Jerm's eyebrows raise.

The Jerm: "You're overreacting, clean yourself up, and go back out there!"

Suddenly a florescent lightbulb swings out of no where, and smashes across Legend's face. Legend falls over, anc clutches his face. Cross steps into the scene now, and starts dragging Legend away by his foot.

Cross: "'scuse me, Jerm. Gotta take out the trash."

The Jerm hollars after him, "WHAT? I'M NOT PAYING YOU TO BE A GARBAGEMAN!"

Cross picks Legend up, and tosses him right through a wall into the male's locker-room. We hear a bunch of girllish screams as Cross walks in through the hole in the wall, grabs Johnny, and suplexes him through the wall this time. Now that the entire wall is destroyed we can see who was screaming. Cross gets up right as we look, and gives Big Bad Kowalski a look.

Cross: "What the Hell are you doing?"

BBK covers himself up with a towel.

BBK: "Let's talk about what I wasn't doing. I wasn't trying on Serenity's bras. I wasn't in the male lockerroom because I'm still in the STS bus, and I definitely wasn't seen on camera! BESIDES, YOU GOT A MATCH TO DO ALREADY, JEEZ!"

We turn to see Legend getting to his feet, and starting to run away. Cross of course follows after him, catches up to him, and starts throwing him into things again. Cross tosses JL straight through a door and we hear more screams, femalre screams this time as Cross walks into see JL laying on the floor as Kit Black runs away in a towel. JL scurries off between Cross' legs back into the hallway as Cross runs up and grabs him by the hair. Cross finds the catering table, and grabs a pot of coffee. He smashes it across the back of Johnny's head, and the scolding hot coffee runs down Legend's back. Legend's screams make everyone around them cup their ears. Soon enough Cross powerbombs Legend through the catering table itself. Cross disappears for a second to grab something out of a fan's cooler, he reappears holding it above his head. Legend starts to get up, and looks up to see Cross holding a 40 ounce bottle of Budweiser above his head. Legend shoots to his feet, and pokes Cross right in the eyes. Cross drops the 40... right into Legend's hands. This prompts Legend to grab it, and smash it over Cross' head. Cross stumbles back, and brushes some of the glass out of his hair as Legend books it again.

Kewl: "I don't see how that would effect Cross, that probably happens to him every weekend."

Kenni: "Legend was the one swinging the 40 this time, Joey."

Kewl: "Exactly. You know, that was probably Cross' beer anyways."

Cross follows after Johnny who is making a B-line for the parking lot, looking to leave the property all together. Cross follows after, and soon enough they're out in the parking lot. Legend runs for his car, which appears to be a Chevy Aveo. Johnny gives the camera a look.

Legend: "It's a rental!"

Legend grabs his keys, which were in a spot where he could reach them easily. This was probably plan "b". He fumbles for the key to the door, and soon enough Cross is behind him. Before Johnny could react his face is slammed through the glass. Cross pulls Legend out of the car.

Cross: "Looks like you're not getting the deposit back on it."

Cross looks like he's going to powerslam him into the Aveo's hood, but Legend slips out somehow AGAIN. Legend dashes away from Cross, hops up onto another car, and leaps towards this concrete wall. Legend climbs to the top, and starts to do a little balancing act trying to get away from Cross. Cross hops up onto the car Legend used, and easily hops up onto the concrete wall. He follows after Johnny who comes to a dead-end. Legend looks back at Cross, and acts as if this is do or die. He rushes towards Cross, and gets the biggest and stiffest right haymaker you will ever see in your life. Legend starts to fall off the wall, but Cross catches him. He sets him up in a vertebreaker postion.

Kenni: "DON'T DO IT CROSS, DON'T DO IT!"

Kewl: "OH PLEASE, CROSS! DESTROY THIS GUY!"

Within in a second Cross jumps off the concrete wall with Johnny hanging there upside down. It seems like fifteen minutes pass before an impact happens, and when it does...

BAM! SMASH! BOOM!

Cross sends Legend through the roof of Ryan Cain's Jeep Wrangler with the Shadows Fall, making the roof collapse, and all the windows in the car explode. Cross looks a little shaky, but he stands up out of the wreck. We get up close to see Johnny screaming in pain, holding his neck. Cross slams JL head first through what was elft of the windshield and pushes him out onto the hood as he crawls out on top of Johnny rolling him face down. Cross wraps his arm up, and cinches in the Crucification. Johnny yells out in pain, and raises his hand as a ref appears out of the blue.

Kewl: "Is Johnny gonna tap?"

Kenni: "No! Cross is weak!"

Soon enough Johnny is tapping onto the hood of the busted up Wrangler, and the ref basically pries Cross off of Legend after he declares him the winner. Well at least he tries to pry him off, soon after Cross hops off the hood, and just walks away.

Cross: "Ryan's gonna be pissed about that."

"Edgecrusher" is playing back in the arena as Binkle announces Cross as the winner of the match. After that we fade backstage.

We're back ringside, and it's time for the Woman's Rumble! Woo! The first entrant happens to be the lovely mime Alia Starr who holds her W2k Championess title proudly. She walks down the ramp, kickin' it to her theme song, which doesn't appear to need any mention right now. Binkle announces her, and right after that we hear "Drama Queen" by the Switches hit over the PA system. Serenity wastes no time at all, and dashes down to the ring. She dumbs her pre-ring jacket or whatever, and slides into the ring. Alia walks over to her, and Serenity pops up like an Artic fox! WOO ICY! The bell rings, and they do battle! BATTLE!

Binkle: "Our second entrant... SERENITY!"

Serenity starts throwing jabs at Alia's face, and Alia tries to block, but is getting knocked around like NED on a hot Saturday night. Serenity hits Alia with a solid DDT, then picks her up in order to eliminate her. However it fails like one of Cross' drug tests. Serenity gets a little angry, only a little though, and starts making Alia look like her red-headed step-child. Poor Annie... er Alia. Serenity sends Alia into the ropes, and right as Alia is about to roll away from a hip toss, Serenity grabs a handful of hair, and rips her to the mat. Soon enough Pyxxi Dewolfe makes her way out to her theme, and tries to get at Serenity, who just knocks her on her face with a bulldog after Pyxxi tried throwing a punch.

Kewl: "Looks like Serenity is in control early on in this match! She must really want the Championess title!"

Alia is looking worn out as Serenity throws her into the turnbuckle to try at eliminating her again. Serenity lifts her onto the top rope, and starts throwing smacks and punches in random fashion. Alia is hanging by a thread off the top rope, but now Pyxxi intervenes once again! What a jerk! She grabs Serenity, and starts throwing vengeful elbow shots at her. Serenity realizing full-well that she just had Alia there, who is now pulling herself back up. Serenity frickin' snaps, elbows Pyxxi right in the eye, and hits a huge snap vertical suplex. Pyxxi's on the mat now, understanding that she just done messed up, boy! Serenity stands up only to find Alia still in the ring, so she does what any rational woman would and snaps. She breaks out in a full-out dash, springs into the air, and does an AJ Styles-esque forearm that sends Alia soaring over the top ropes!

Binkle: "First elimination - Alia Starr by Serenity!"

Kewl: "Whoa, the Championess herself is eliminated first? How unexpected, now there HAS to be a new championess crowned."

Serenity looks over the top rope, and realizes that she just eliminated someone. Woo! Just as she throws her arm up, Pyxxi attacks! Aah! Pyxxi tries tossing Serenity over the ropes, but Serenity ain't havin' none of that, sista. Nuh uh! Serenity powers Pyxxi off of her, rebounds off the ropes, and tackles her to the mat. Now the shoosting begins! By shoosting I mean Serenity jabbing the jibber-jaw of Pyxxi. Soon enough Rorie Steele runs out from the back accompanied by her music, and she dashes down to the ring. She slides into the ring right before some guy tells her he's got the same name as her.

Binkle: "Our next entrant - Rorie Steele!"

Rorie walks right into a Serenity-storm, and gets a spinebuster right off the bat. Now Rorie and Pyxxi are both on the mat after Serenity continues tearing up the place. Deja vu? Serenity picks Pyxxi up, hits her a couple times, and then works in a headlock to wear hear down before attempting elminating her. Before she can eliminate her, Rorie ruins it all by dropkicking them both! They both tumble to the mat as another thirty seconds winds down, and out comes Summer Stratus!

Binkle: "Our next entrant - Summer Stratus!"

Summer Stratus slides into the ring, and meets Rorie head-to-head. They start battling it out before Summer knocks Rorie to the mat, and sees Pyxxi running full speed at her. Summer backs up, ducks down, and pulls the top rope down as Pyxxi Superman's Dat Hoe over the rope. The crowd can't decide whether to like what just happened, or boo it. Oops, the "emotions" flash card guy fell asleep! Maybe we should send him a can of W2Kola.

Binkle: "Second elimination - Pyxxi DeWolfe by Summer Stratus!"

Kewl: "Looks like DeWolfe is out of the picture now!"

Kenni: "Kinda like that picture of me boning your mom, your sister totally missed my face!"

Summer stands up, and sees Rorie dashing at her this time. Only this time Summer just dropkicks her. Not-so deja vu. Serenity gets back in the picture, and starts battling it out with Summer who puts up a pretty good fight. Soon enough Summer gets the upper-hand, sends Serenity into the ropes, lifts her into the air on the rebound, and hits a huge flapjack/boob-busta! Serenity holds her gorgeous chest in pain, that makes a lot of males in the audience unhappy. It's not right, they should be the one's holding her chest! We'll blame Scientology for now. Soon enough "Barracuda" by Heart hits over the speakaz, and Kit Black walks out, and all dah ladies boo her, but the boys oh they just can't get enough, baby! Kit strolls down the ramp, and gets into the ring.

Binkle: "Our next entrant - Kit Black!"

Kit Black hits the ring, and starts battling it with all three ladies in the ring. Soon enough Summer and Serenity branch off into their own fight, as Kit and Rorie go the other way. Kit has Rorie on the ropes, and hits her chest with vicious chops. Rorie's chest is beat red now, as she finally starts battling back. Soon enough she's making Kit backpeddle, but Kit counters with a nice knee to the gut, and then lifts her into the air vertically. She backs up as if she can't handle it, but we realize what's she's doing as she releases the suplex over the ropes, letting Rorie crash and burn to the outside. The fans go nuts for that.

Binkle: "Third elimination - Rorie Steele by Kit Black!"

Kit backs up right into Summer who locks her into a full nelson, and then slams her down to the mat. Serenity butts in too, and hits Summer into the back of the head with a slap. Summer turns around right into Serenity's "Sacrifice", a flying neckbreaker slam. Summer hits the mat hard, as our last entrant's music hits, "Voices" by Disturbed. Rain Storms walks out to the ramp, and walks down to a crowd full of boos. Jerks, no appreciation. Rain walks up the steps, and looks at all dah ladies in the ring (Kit just hitting a reverse DDT on Serenity).

Binkle: "Our last entrant - Rain Storms!"

The last of the females is in the ring now, and goes straight for Kit Black who is the only one standing. Rain runs right through her with a nice clothesline, backs up, and hits an elbow drop on Serenity. As soon as she gets up Summer is up, and not in a good spot. Rain walks over to Summer, and nails her a couple of times in the jaw with some haymakers. Soon enough she sets her up for a powerbomb, backhands Kit before she can intervene, and lifts Summer into the air. The fans are buzzing!

Kewl: "Is she really about to do what I think she's about to do?"

Kenni: "IN COMING!"

Rain runs forward a litte bit, and launches Summer out of the ring, and into the announcers table. Summer doesn't go through it, but she still feels like crap after.

Binkle: "The fourth elimination - Summer Stratus by Rain Storms."

Kewl: "Well now it's come down to three, and it's Serenity, Kit Black, and Rain Storms."

The three ladies are standing in the ring, and you can cut the tension with a plastic spoon! Serenity launches at Kit who braces herself, Serenity throws slaps and punches, and a shoe? No, we just imagined that. Rain intervenes out of no where with a HUGE missle drop kick that hits both ladies. Rain stands up quickly, and grabs Kit to try to eliminate first. But, then the lights dim. The PA goes to static. White noise chops through the ears of every single fan as the Jumbotron shows white noise, too...

Voice: "thhhh.... thh... warning... thhh... it's not over...thhh... it's never over.... thhhh... until it's thhhh... over... thhhh..."

A sillohette on the jumbotron.

Voice: "Thhh... you... thhhh... thought it was safe..... thhh... in the desert..."

Joey Kewl: "What is this all about?"

Trunks Kenni: "No freakin clue..."

Voice: "... but you have... thhhhhh.. been found... fffp... you have been.... thhhh... targeted... tthhhh... by the personification thhhh... of.... thhh... perfection...

The entrants in the match are all watching... a surprise entrant maybe?

Voice: ".... thhht.... you have... thht... will be.... thhh... everything you know.... thhhhh... has changed.

On the Tron, eyes flash. Steel, beautiful eyes. Narrowed in confidence. In brilliance. Then, it freezes, and goes to white out.

Voice: "... you are... thhh.... obsolete.... thtttt.."

The tron then fades slowly to to eyes again...

As it fades...

Joey Kewl: "BUD's Dannica in Wrestling 2000?"

Trunks Kenni: "Well we do have PWT's Champion....... and that is why we are the authority of efeds..."

As the lights come back to normal... Kit doesn't give up as Rain has her half-way over the ropes, she falls to the apron, and slides back in. Rain can't do much as Serenity is back up now, and getting in her face and stuff. Rain pushes Serenity way only to get a chick kick right to the face. Rain his the mat, and Summer takes too long to get away from the ropes. Kit Black springs up from the apron, grabs Serenity by the back, sets her up in a vertical suplex, and tosses her to the outside!

Binkle: "The fifth elimination - Serenity by Kit Black!"

Kewl: "Amazing! Serenity lasted the longest in this match, and did great. It's too bad she couldn't win it, but she was out of position."

Kenni: "Your mom is out of position all of the time, she was probably out of position when she gave birth to you."

Kewl: "Not cool!"

Rain is up now, and before she can hit Kit off the apron, Kit springhboards off the ropes, and hits a huge headscissors takedown! Rain hits the mat hard, and it looks like Kit is in control now! Kit starts laying in boots to Rain's body after she stands up. Kit then lifts Rain up, hits her gut, and goes for the "Seeing Black". But suddenly Rain moves out of the way, Kit hits her behind on the mat, but deals with the pain only to run right into the "Down Pour", the Sonjay Cutter. Kit bounces off the mat, and looks out of it now. Rain stands up, and drags Kit over to the ropes. She lifts her up, and looks like she's about to eliminate her! But Kit is still in this, somehow she rebounds and hits a huge tornado DDT!

Kewl: "Nice reversal!"

Kenni: "What was the point of saying that?"

Kewl: "The real question is; what's the point of your entire life?"

Kenni: "To make your life miserable by pointing out the complete obvious, and that's me doing your mom."

Kewl: "[mad]"

While Kewl and Kenni were chattering, Kit was on the top rope now, and looking for a high risk move! This will put it away, but suddenly Rain springs to her feet, runs up to the turnbuckle, hops onto the second rope, and arm drags Kit off of the turnbuckle! Kit crashes into the barricade, and then hits the matting outside of the ring. The fans go nuts, but then they see Kit doing a balancing act on the top rope... AND FALLS TOO! But before she hits the floor below, one of her hands are able to grab the second rope, and she pulls herself up to the top. She skins the cat back into the ring, ala Shawn Michaels. Everyone is extremely impressed with that as she raises her arm in victory as "Voices" hits again.

Binkle: "HERE IS YOUR WINNER, AND THE NEW W2K CHAMPIONESS... RAIN STORMS!"

Rain is handed the W2K Championess title, and drops to her knees like Kewl's mom, but Rain isn't giving oral! No no no! You should be kissing her feet now as she is the W2K Championness! She raises the title in the air, and is having a good time celebrating. Suddenly "My Leftovers" by Porcelain and the Tramps (Porcelain > you) hits over the speakers. Rain can't believe her ears as Scarlett Manson steps out from behind the curtains, and stares down her stablemate. We fade to backstage.

After his *exceptionally* painful loss early too Cross... The W2K Camera's find Johnny Legend cleaned up, large cut across his forehead from those chair shots, with large bruises in his lower back as he lies half naked on a Massage Table in the Texan Connection locker room.

Legend: "Freakin' asshole.. He almost killed me."

Legend wasnt bitter about the defeat though.

Legend: "This is half Ismaili's fault... What fiend would sign this match. Next time I see him imma take off his tea-towel and beat him with it."

The hot, sexy masseuse rubs Legends lower back...

Legend: "Damn, you're good. Make sure you ease the pain in my neck too, cause that fat freak almost freakin' broke it."

Legend makes a satisfied 'ahhhhh' sound, as the masseuse gets too work on his neck and shoulders.

Legend: "Listen, bebeh, I think I landed awkwardly on my ass, massage it for me will ya."

"Christ..."

Kinsley walks in, shaking his head. Legend looks up at him, and sighs...

Legend: "Im having a little *me* time okay. I just had a life threatening match, damnit."

Kinsley: "Only a complete pussy would have a massage after one 'hardcore' match."

Legend: "I was put through a car."

Kinsley: "Eh, atleast it was a nice lookin' one."

Kinsley strolls up to the masseuse...

Kinsley: "Step aside, sweetheart."

The masseuse backs off, and suddenly Legend looks very worried..

Legend: "Woah woah woah."

Kinsley: "Is this where it hurts, Johnny?"

Kinsley slaps down on Legends lower back... Kinsley frowns as JL yelps in pain. Kinsley shakes his head, and then drives a fist down into Legend's lower back.

Legend: "AHH!!.... YOU MOTHA F-"

Kinsley: "HOLD it there, Johnny. It's just a little pain..."

Kinsley sighs again, turning away towards the door.

Kinsley: "Get your pansy ass into some wrestling gear, Anarchy Rumble is starting like... now?"

Kinsley strolls out the door.

Kinsley: "Pussy."

Legend looks bitterly at the doorway.

Legend: "Stupid redneck, dirty, drunk idiotic tex-ARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

The masseuse starts applying pressure too Legend's tender neck area as we fade too black.