Im sorry to hear of your losses as well. So odd how the three of us are connected in such a way. It was my mother in law that passed. I also keep wanting to say to you angels breath, that yes life is a roller coaster ride, and it helps settle me some when some really freaky sh#& occurs lately. I keep thinking, okay, theres another loop. Hold on tight! And I constantly find myself saying "I dont know" "I dont know"
I loved my mother in law in my own way, and to mourn for her with my "spiritual knowledge" makes me feel like an imposter cause I know she is in a better place. I know she is happy now. She wanted to die a long time ago. Gave up a long time ago. Now her suffering is gone. But when I dont mourn I feel Im being selfish and should at least shed a tear. AGH! So conflicting! My human side and my spirit side dual-ing it out. Thus "I dont know" when I really do know and dont know how to say it. And when I do speak, everyone takes it and runs with it and creates this whole thing that never existed. Geez, death can create some of the weirdest situations, the weirdest stories and the weirdest reactions. I am dry eyed, brain is officially fried. How is one to fight gossip? Thus, "I dont know". Its my only saving grace. |
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