WINDZ OF CHANGES

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Ok Tuesday we found out that it was cancer. Thats all. Also we were given an appointment to see a cancer doc. and also to get a pet scan to see if it has spread. Today our family doctor called us and told us that he didn't think we should wait until tuesday to see the cancer doc. We need to see her tomorrow. Thats so we can start his radiation treatments. The reason why is that he is coughing up blood and the tumor is right next to the main artery. So he could have it rupture at any time. He talked to my husband first but didn't tell him this. He wanted me to tell him. So I thought when he talked tome that Jerry already knew but I was wrong and I just gave him the news srraight. Now he is even more upset because he wasn't told directly. Everything is my fault right now. If I say something he yells at me. Everything I do is wrong. He also won't talk to me about any of this except yesterday he said he thought that radiation is a waste of time. Also I am fighting to get his disability because we have no income comming in except my disability and that sure isn't going to go far. I just don't know what to do or say right now. I am totally exhausted and am having trouble walking with my leg because I don't pay as much attenton as I should. I wonder if this is all normal or not. I was right that I was fortunate that I only lost a leg. I used to say that at least it wasn't cancer or a stroke. At least I could walk again soon. He doesn't eat and his blood sugar is sky high right now from the stress.

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oh shirley i am so sorry you need to go through all this... it must be soo stressful on you as well as jerry.. please let me know if you ever need to talk im here fo you, huggs love suzy

hi shirley....you are both scared for different reasons at this point....and there is truth to the words "we hurt the ones we love the most" when there is trouble..i am sure things seem like they are spinning out of control but you have to keep your head and be strong for your hubbie now....men dont handle things as good as we do this i know from experience....we find strength when we think we cant so hang in there....as far as normal....is life normal?....i think not....life is just individualized and each of us has to deal with whatever is handed us.

I know what you are going thru. I went thru it with my Grandpa though. He was very angry at first. And then got scared that he was going to die. he went thru a new treatment and the doctors said that he had a better chance with this treatment. We found out the day after Christmas that he still had cancer and that there was nothing they could do. He then started trying to accept it. I know that when we found out that he still had cancer that he would yell at Grandma and me. Like Risi said that we hurt the ones we are the closest to. What I finally learned was to just let him know I cared about him and that I loved him. I know that before Grandpa died that he needed physical touch. I know it is hard. Let me know if you need to talk. I am willing to help as much as I can.

Hey Shirley you go off somewhere girl and you scream and holler all you want...and get mad even....and then after you've done that, and you are relaxed within yourself, you then will be able to take what your hubby dishes out, because at the moment he is just going through the emotions, and anger is the first one and he doens't mean to be like this with you, because he is going to need you just so much very soon, as he goes through the scarey part...Now you my friend as the others have said you are going to need to be very strong for the 2 of you's, its hard, but like it was said, us woman in this sort of thing are the stronger ones...But with prayer my dear friend and with all the support you have here, you can do it, and you will get over this obstacle...My thoughts and prayers are with you both...Hugs...Joan

Important Announcement The MSN Groups service will close in February 2009. You can move your group to Multiply, MSN’s partner for online groups. Learn More
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