Domestic violence includes physical, emotional, sexual, and financial abuse.  All forms of abuse are devastating to victims, their families, and their communities.  Domestic violence results in more health issues, loss of income/employment, health and behavioral issues in children, risky behavior in teens, and alcohol and drug abuse.   Domestic violence is the leading cause of homelessness among women and children.

While alcohol and drugs do not cause abuse, they do reduce inhibitions and the abuse may be worse.

Domestic abuse is not about "anger".  It is about Power and Control.  An abuser uses physical force, intimidation, threats, belittling, yelling, constant criticism, accusations, money, and/or sex to maintain control over his/her partner.  An abuser does things to isolate a partner to further gain control and the abuser may use religion/belief systems to justify the abuse.  The abuser takes no responsibility for the abusive behavior and blames the victim.  Over time, the abuse erodes the victim's self-esteem and self-confidence while guilt and blame thrive.

Know that abuse is NEVER the victim's fault.  Each person is responsible for his/her behavior and can make choices regarding how to handle issues/concerns.  EVERY human being deserves to be treated with respect.

I plan to add more information in the days ahead.  In the mean time, THANK YOU to all who have responded.  After posting the tag in a number of groups I belong to, it is wonderful to see the support and hear the heart-warming stories from survivors.  If you are abused, know that help is available.  Be very careful about using a personal computer as the sites you visit can be found by your abuser.  Go to a school or library to use a computer.  You can also look under Crisis Services in your Yellow Pages or call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY)