Is This Elder Abuse?

Alice, 75, a widow, lived in a small apartment with her son, Frank, 54. Frank had been in and out of drug and alcohol treatment centers for years, but was doing well for the last six months since he moved back in with his mother. Alice knew here son had nowhere else to go so she took him in under two conditions: he had to find a job and he could not drink.

Frank found a job and things seemed to be going well until he stopped coming home right after work. Alice knew he was stopping at the corner bar because she could smell the alcohol on his breath. The third time this happened, Alice confronted her son. Frank immediately became belligerent, verbally abusing her and forcing her to go to her room. The next night Alice confronted him again threatening to throw him out if he continued to drink. Frank became enraged and started running toward his mother with his fist raised over his head. Fearing for her life, Alice fled to the safety of her neighbor's house.

Is This Elder Abuse?

Carol, 24, divorced, lived on the second floor of an apartment with her two young children. Living below her on the first floor was Beatrice, 86, a nice old lady who didn't leave here apartment very often because of her arthritic knees and poor eyesight. Carol and her children visited Beatrice frequently and often helped with her laundry in exchange for occasional babysitting. Beatrice loved their company.

Every Saturday, Carol offered to do the grocery shopping for Beatrice. Because she could not do it herself, Beatrice was happy to accept Carol's help. Carol thought it was okay to keep $20 of the change each week because she was taking the time and trouble to help Beatrice; although, she was never offered any money. Carol thought Beatrice would never realize the money was missing because of her poor eyesight.

A Reality

In both scenarios it is clear that elder abuse is a disturbing reality in today's society. The risk of being abused, neglected or exploited is real for many older people. Family members or other caregivers are most often the abusers. The problem crosses all geographic, socioeconomic, racial, and ethnic barriers.

According to the National Center on Elder Abuse (NCEA), "Elder abuse in domestic settings is a widespread problem, possibly affecting hundreds of thousands of elderly people across the country. However, because it is still largely hidden under the shroud of family secrecy, this type of abuse is grossly underreported." In fact, many experts agree that the reported numbers represent only the "tip of the iceberg." It is estimated that only 1 out of 14 domestic elder abuse cases is reported to the authorities.

In Illinois, it is estimated that four to five percent of the older population (approximately 80,000 persons) is abused. Only 5,000 cases or so are reported each year. Currently, six out of ten reported cases are substantiated after investigation.

Types of elder abuse may include physical, sexual, or emotional abuse; neglect, or financial exploitation. It is possible that more than one type of abuse may be suspected in any given case. Financial exploitation and emotional abuse are the types most commonly reported.

 Warning Signs of Elder Abuse and Neglect

Just as there are many types of abuse, there are also numerous signs or symptoms that abuse may be taking place. The following signs do not always indicate an abusive situation, but can be important clues to possible abuse or neglect.

Symptoms of an Abused Older Person

• Unusual or unexplained injuries (cuts, bruises, burns)
• Unkempt appearance
• Pressure or bed sores
• Confinement against will (tied to furniture or locked in room)
• Dehydration or malnutrition without a medical cause
• Fear
• Withdrawal
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Visits to many doctors or hospitals
• Strange and inconsistent explanations for injuries
• Helplessness
• Hesitation to talk openly

Symptoms of an Abuser

• Verbally assaulting, threatening or insulting the older person

• Concerned only with the older person's financial situation and not his or her health or well-being
• Problems with alcohol or drug abuse
• Not allowing the older person to speak for him- or herself
• Blaming the older person
• Attitudes of indifference or anger toward the older person
• Socially isolating the older person from others.

There is a reason that wisdom is associated with age. Traditionally, elders have been the wise men and women of communities. Most spiritual leaders apprentice for most of their lives before beginning their practice. In many parts of the world, elders are honored and respected for the wisdom they've gained through life experience. They are considered a valuable source of knowledge and have an important role to fulfill in passing on traditions and customs.

In many parts of the world, nursing homes for the elderly are rare. Caring for one's aging parents is considered an honor and a blessing. In other cultures it's not uncommon for three or four generations to live together under one roof. Immediate families consist of children, parents, grandparents, great grandparents, and sometimes great aunts and uncles. Such intergenerational coexistence is beneficial to all family members. There are caregivers for both young children and the elderly. And older relatives can pass down the family history to children and act as role models for younger family members.

In Native American culture, elders are appreciated for their close connection to nature and the spiritual world. They are known as "wisdomkeepers," acting as caretakers of the planet. Respected for their life experience and wisdom, African elders serve as mediators between deceased ancestors and living family members.

Honoring and respecting our elders is a way of building community and strengthening society. It helps appreciate every stage of life and view aging in a positive light. After all, hopefully we will all have the opportunity to become sages in our later years.

For more information visit Allaboutaging.com