What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?
Beneduck Arnold!

What did Paul Revere say at the end of his ride?
"I gotta get a softer saddle!"

What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?
The Boston Flea Party!
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What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!

Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!

Why did the British cross the Atlantic?
To get to the other tide!

What do you call a parade of German mercenaries?
A Hessian procession!

What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?
Yankee Poodle!

Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up!

What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?
The Fodder of Our Country!

What's red, white, blue, and almost as ugly as a dog?
A revolutionary warthog!

What did one flag say to the other flag?
Nothing. It just waved!

What's red, white, black and blue?
Uncle Sam falling down the steps!

Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?
At the chopping mall!

What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?
Liberty!

What was General Washington's favourite tree?
The infantry!

Which colonists told the most jokes?
Punsylvanians!

What would you get if you crossed Washington's home with nasty insects?
Mt. Vermin!

What did a patriot put on his dry skin?
Revo-lotion!

What would you get if you crossed a dog with the Father of Our Country?
George Washingtongue!

Who is a dogs favourite Founding Father?
Bone Franklin!

What would you get if you crossed Jon with the English king in 1776?
King George the Nerd!

What dance was very popular in 1776?
Indepen-dance!

Which one of Washington's officers had the best sense of humour?
Laughayette!

What is a hungry boys favourite picnic event?
The snack race!

"How was the food at the Fourth of July picnic?
"The hot dogs were bad and the brats were wurst!"

What did Washington say as he crossed the Delaware?
"Next time I'm going to reserve a seat!"

Teacher: "Why did Washington chop down the cherry tree with his hatchet?"
Student: "Because his mom wouldn't let him play with the chain saw!"

Teacher: "The Declaration of Independence was written in Philadelphia. True or false?"
Student: "False! It was written in ink!"

Why did Washington win the battle of Trenton?
Because the enemy soldiers were Hessian around!

What would you get if you crossed a monster with one of Washington's officers?
Baron von Steupid!

What has four legs, a shiny nose, and fought for England?
Rudolph the Redcoat Reindeer!

What march would you play at a jungle parade?
"Tarzan Stripes Forever"!

What would you get if you crossed a monster with a redcoat?
A bigger target.

Why did the British soldiers wear red coats?
So they could hide in the tomatoes.

Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?
Because they're both cracked!