YOUR MONDAY GROANERS
The guy who invented Venetian blinds is a hero. If it wasn't for him, it'd be curtains for all of us!
Mother: "Eat your spinach. It's good for growing kids."
Child: "Who wants to grow kids?"
Fred was explaining to his friend how his uncle tried to make a new car for himself: "...so he took the wheels from a Cadillac, a radiator from a Ford, some fenders from a Plymouth..." His friend interrupts at this point, "Holy Smokes, what did he end up with?" Fred replies, "About four years with time off for good behavior...."
An Englishman was visiting a restaurant in New York when the waitress brought him the soup du jour. Distressed at its appearance, the Englishman says, "Good heavens! What is this?" The waitress answers, "It's bean soup." "Oh, I don't care what it's been," replies the Englishman, "What is it now?"
If life was fair, linguistics would be the study of linguini.
Is a lamb stew much ado about mutton?
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