THE FUNNY THINGS KIDS SAY
Annabelle, 2, and Austin, 7, were acting up in a local department store, unaware that Santa was nearby. As they turned into another aisle, there Santa was. He asked, "Are you being good?" Austin said, "Yes." Santa asked, "Are your rooms clean? When I come on Christmas Eve I don't leave toys for children who have so many toys that they can't keep their rooms clean." Austin replied, "My room is clean! My room is clean!"
Santa asked Annabelle, "Is you room clean?" Annabelle found her voice long
enough to gasp, "You came to town!" -- Kathy Perry (grandmother of Austin
and Annabelle) of Waynesboro, Georgia
Seth, 4, was complaining to his mother, asking why they had to go to
mass every week. She explained that they had to go to church to tell God all the bad things they had done so that God could forgive them. Seth thought for a few seconds and then told his mother, "I'd better go every day!" -- Lorna Mavis (grandmother of Seth) of Auburn, Indiana
Patricia was on the computer listening to her son Caleb, 4, tell a story to his sister and friend in the kitchen. Caleb said, "We used to pretend hunting out in the woods with pretend guns and then we came home
and Mommy was mad at us." Patricia asked, "When was that?" Caleb piped up, "Years and years ago." It was this past summer. -- Patricia Stover (mother of Caleb) of Red House, West Virginia
About two weeks before Christmas Bethany, 5, asked her mother, in a very conspiratorial whisper, "Should we wrap your food processor now?" -- Tamara (mother of Bethany) of Pennsylvania
Connie remembers her aunt, the mother of five, said her 8-year-old daughter commented (while the youngest was screaming), "I know why the Wise
Men came so late for the birth -- they knew that newborns cry a lot and they took their time!" -- Connie in Austria
When Penny was 4 they were at the
parish rectory for a meeting after Mass. There was no longer a resident priest so the house was furnished but not lived in. After exploring the house, Penny came running into the meeting. With great excitement, she said, "Mommy, I found God's
bedroom!
He has a picture of his mother hanging on the wall!" -- Eileen Snow of Missouri
Mashell had lost a tooth and dutifully put it under her pillow for the tooth fairy to retrieve. When Kristi, Mashell's mom, went to retrieve the tooth she found it wrapped in a note that read: "Dear Mom and Dad, I know you are the tooth fairy and I promise not to tell Tyler (her younger brother). You don't even have to leave me any money. I just want to know
what you do with the teeth. Mashell." The next morning Mashell woke up to
find money beneth her pillow; she didn't say a word to her parents but just looked at them a little curiously at breakfast. A little later in the day when Tyler was occupied, Kristi took Mashell by the hand and led her into her parents' bedroom and closed the door. She then took out a box that held both kids' teeth in it. Mashell's response was, "Eeewww Mom, that's
kinda gross! What are you going to do with all those teeth?" -- Christal Bricker (aunt of Mashell) of Colorado
Here is the "next chapter" from Christal. When Kyle, 5, lost his first tooth, he asked, "Mom, what does the tooth fairy do with all those teeth?" Thinking as
quickly as she could Christal replied, "She takes them to heaven and recycles them to new babies. You know how little babies
don't have any teeth?" He replied, "Yes" and Christal said, "Well, the new babies need teeth, so the tooth fairy recycles the teeth she gets from you when you lose them. She takes them to heaven and gives them to new babies waiting to be born." Kyle's eyes grew wide and he said, "Wow, that's a really good idea! I always wondered how little babies got new teeth!" To which Christal said, "That's why brushing your teeth is so important; you
have to take good care of your teeth so the next baby will have healthy teeth to eat with." -- Christal Bricker (mother of Kyle and Caitlin)
Marsha tells about her granddaughter, who is now 25, who many years ago had a manger scene set up on top of her mother's antique treadle sewing machine. The little girl proudly showed it to Marsha. When Marsha noticed Baby Jesus was not in the manger, the little girl said, emphatically,
"Well, Grandma, he doesn't come until Christmas Day and we keep him right here in the top drawer of the sewing machine." And she opened the drawer a wee bit so that Marsha could take a peek at him. -- Marsha Tollefson of Colorado
When Dennis was three or four he and his mother picked out a pair of house slippers for his Dad for Father's Day. His mom emphasized the secrecy issue, and Dennis was doing fine until his father came home from work, and he said, proudly, "Daddy, we got you a present, and I can't tell you what it is, but you wear them on your feet! -- Dennis Smith of Oak Ridge, North Carolina
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