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Odd Items From British
Newspapers
1) Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur
Purdey about
a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas
said, "We
agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's
possible
Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during
the
explosion that destroyed his house." (The Daily
Telegraph)
2) Police reveal that a woman arrested for
shoplifting had a
whole salami in her underwear. When asked why,
she said it
was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend.
(The
Manchester Evening News)
3) Irish
police are being handicapped in a search for a
stolen van,
because they cannot issue a description. It's a
Special Branch
vehicle and they don't want the public to
know what it looks
like. (The Guardian)
4) A young girl who was blown out to
sea on a set of
inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an
inflatable
lobster. A coastguard spokesman commented, "This sort
of
thing is all too common". (The Times)
5)
At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed the
coastguard and asked them to estimate the wind speed. They
replied they were sorry, but they didn't have a gauge.
However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his
Land Rover off the cliff. (Aberdeen Evening Express)
6)
Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue, Boscombe, delighted
the
audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of
war who
was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated
at the
end of 1945, she recalled. "He'd always seemed a nice
friendly
chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of
our lawn in
February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.'"
(Bournemouth
Evening Echo)
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