PRAYER
eternity's song list
Coming up with a name for this page has been very difficult to do. What I am describing here can be called many different things. What it is basically is how to Feel Spirit, Honor Spirit and Realizing you are one with Spirit.
I am sure that I will have many people disagreeing with my perspective on prayer so let me just offer my e-mail address in advance ... for complaints please send e-mail to [email protected]
The objective of prayer in my mind is to open to Spirit (God/Godess), and to have the daily realization that you are a very special part of this universe and unconditional love. Their are many different reasons I pray, depending alot on the day. I pray for comfort, I pray for hope, I pray for guidance, but most of all I pray so that I can be held by Spirit for the opportunity to open my heart and my soul and exchange the purest love I am capable of giving and receiveing an even purer unconditional love.
It wasnt always easy.... its still not Always easy. When you open yourself this way to Spirit you begin to have clarity and truth. I like to believe that I am a seeker of truth, and until recently when I realized that some of those truths I seek threaten to shatter the very core of my own belief system. Then I realized I seek any truth as long as it agrees with my beliefs. hahaha. Well what can I say other than, I'm a work in process 
I wanted to touch on a few of the "blocks" you may encounter. I will be very honest with you.... these sound easy enough but when they hit all you can do is sort it and sort it and hope and pray it will clear. The secret to this process is .... accept/embrase/release.
ANGER is a good place to start when talking about blocks. When you grow up in a world that talks about the Grace of God and look around you to see people suffering, people dying, and your own pain, its easy to wonder where God is. When I first began to reach out to Spirit I was very angry about life. I had decided years before that God was a cruel joke, or simply didn't care about me. The first time I prayed I had absolutly no idea what I was supposed to do. I began my prayer and while I was praying the voice in my head was calling me a liar. I decided that if Spirit did exist Spirit knows what is in my heart and my mind. I mean if Santa knows who's good and bad surely Spirit knows what i'm thinking. So I put down the facade and spoke my mind. Its hard to refer to it as a prayer because it was a bit more of a screaming angry fit. I was mad and I let it out. The amazing thing is after I yelled, complained, blamed and cried I found myself exhausted and open. That is the first time I allowed myself to feel Spirit surround me (perhaps it was surrender). Spirit did, as if there were arms wrapped around me. I also began to have realizations as to why Spirit didn't make things different for me, why things had to be the way they were. It became much clearer to me. What I'm trying to get across is... if your angry don't hide it let it ride! Go somewhere you have privacy and yell it out, go get it cleared up. This is not Spirit's burden this is yours. Spirit is there and has always been there, you choose to feel or dont feel. I bet that you will hear some answers, gain some understanding, or at the very least unload some of that anger you've carried around with you.
FORGIVENESS this one is a tuff one. It seems to be preprogrammed into people that if they do something wrong that Spirit will be angry and therefore turn away from them. However, the same religions that imprint that idea into our minds also talks about Spirit's love as being unconditional. That's the idea behind forgiveness. If you take a good look at your life and your day you'll see that you probably have about 1,000 things to ask forgiveness for every day. It's endless. It's also a trap. What good is forgiveness if someone can do harm intentionally to another and just ask for to be forgiven? My truth does not include Forgiveness in its traditional sense. Instead of me asking Spirit to forgive me I have learned to forgive myself and learn from my mistakes. It is all to easy to look at yourself and decide you are unworthy of Spirit's love and shut down to it. It is a way of punishing yourself. It is not necessary, and you are punishing yourself by withholding the one thing you need most as you are going thru these lessons.
What is prayer and how does it work?
Well I always believed that prayer was simply talking to Spirit and asking for things.... then Spirit would decide if the things you asked for are in the best interest of everyone and grant them. That was a nice belief... so was Santa Clause 
The closer to Spirit I get I always notice that as I grow closer I also sort of mesh then melt into the energy of everything around me. Spirit is within every living thing, within me and opening my eyes to Spirit I see me within everything and everything within me. When you feel this "magic" your spirit is no longer isolated as just you... but instead you are everying, you are part of everything. This energy doesnt change when you get closer to Spirit, its you that open your eyes to it, and are able to feel it. I know how hard this concept is to grasp so i'll share the only example I have been able to come up with: If you were to close your eyes and hear a musical note played continuously, you would identifiy that as a note... but what if that note wasnt alone... what if it was actually several instruments playing in harmony to make one continuouse sound. The combination of the instruments makes something wonderful, but each instrument has its own wonderful sound. Where is Spirit in that example? Spirit is the air we breath, the wood thats used for the instruments, Spirit is how the notes make sound and how sound is brought from the instruments to your ears, Spirit is everything.
Together with the plants, and animals, with other people, with all living things we make a song. The realization that you are a part of that song, and the appriciation for every other instrument is key in this realization.
We as individuals direct energy. Some are very aware of it, some are not aware. Some are efficient and others are not. A thought is energy, hoping someone trips is directing the energy, praying is also directing energy. For this context I'm calling affirmations and mantras prayer as well. Prayer is a way of focusing, centering and directing energy. Dont misunderstand me... I believe in Spirit and pray to Spirit each night. What I'm sharing is my newest understanding of how energy works, how its focused, how it is directed. When you pray to spirit you focus on Spirit, you close out other distractions (center) on Spirit, and you open your heart so your deepest wishes are sent to Spirit and heard. When you are part of the world, part of the song and you have the realization of how you fit. A simple thought can become an action. Some of you have heard me refer to retraining my mind... learning to stop the judgemental knee-jerk reactions I have developed. As you clear your blocks, and become more in tune with Spirit (God) in all living things, your ability to harness and direct energy will grow more and more efficient. When this happens very strange things begin to occur... your thoughts get answered.... thinking "boy I would love to have a ride home right now" - someone pulls over to give you a ride, just thinking ... "wouldn't it be funny if he tripped" and they do. This can be very scary if you arent used to it. It certainly makes you become much more aware of your thoughts and your words, and aware that you have and direct power. There is a name for this, and this is considered a gift.... personally I prefer to call it a realization.... this is refered to as PK (I call it "God Magic").
How do you become closer to Spirit? You open to Spirit. If you want to appreciate the song, you listen to the music. If you want to know Spirit, watch the flowers grow, love the people in the world, acknowledge how beautiful life is and do these things in every waking moment. Pay attention to your thoughts, treat them as tools not as uncontrolled chaotic static. And lastly my very favorite.... talk to Spirit as often as you can remember to.... just a hello, or an I love you, thank you for the sunset.... any silly thing you want, and say hello for me .
- intense female
A final note: Spirit's got one heck of a sense of humor.... learn to laugh along.
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