Iy's one of those things that mothers and grandmothers say to their family members, "Be sure to wear clean underwear in case you have to go to the Emergency Room." And the same advice is often ignored for three very good reasons: (a) no one above the age of five listens to her mother, anyway; (b) wveryone reckons the risk of an ER visit to be slight; and (c) many try to stretch not having to do the laundry for just one more day, even if reduced to wearing the 'least dirty clothes' or that Hawaiian outfit that you thought was a good idea when you bought it but looks a little out of place, even in New Orleans.
That was my situation in my visit to the ER, alas! When the staff discovered the fact, there was a great hubbub. I was mortified; and driven actually to tears when George Clooney said that my case was too much for him, and he had Noah Wyle take it, instead! During my brief stay (I was soon released), the LPNs, the people with the d.t.s and the rooters whispered about me, it seemed. But, I steeled myself, and said, this too will pass. I will live this down. Even when the ER chaplin counseled me on the error of my ways.
So I was taken home, with admonitions from my family to do better. And I found out why. The next morning, the story of my dirty underwear made the fourth page of the Time-Picyaune! (Thank goodness it was on a weekend.) It was also a matter of discussion on one of the local talk radio programs: "Yeah, Cher, I doo think that this not wearing the clean lingerie is some kind of Communiss plot: they ought to look into those professors and students at the university, yes!"
Someone had posted handbills around the neighborhood and in grocery stores advising all of my offense, and some people in dark suits who were holding prayerbooks came over and gave me a scarlet "D" to wear. A large man in uniform wearing mirrored sunglasses and sporting a large pot appeared at my door. It was an Orleans Parish deputy issuing me a citation for my offense, falling under the heading: 'Disturbing the Peace.' Things were deteriorating clearly.
I punted when it came to watching the news on the Fox network. I could not bear to be put under the scrutiny and criticism of O'Reilley.
At least my dog likes me.
Free Forum Hosting
Important Announcement
Recommend
First 
Return to General